what is with him?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2005
what is with him?
6
Wed, 10-26-2005 - 9:49am
I started dating a guy a couple of weeks ago. We went out and hit it off right away. He made it clear that he had a busy schedule, two jobs, back to school but that he liked me and wanted to see me. He would text message me as well just to say hi. We've been out about 4 times in three weeks and when we are together it is great and he seems to like me very much. But within the past week, I have not heard from him at all. He is a bit flighty, I've heard and I don't think he realizes it. I called him this past Saturday and left a message to let him know I was available to hang out Weds. (today) or Fri. this week but I have not heard back from him! Is he just not that into me? Should I just forget it? If we do meet up again, should I say something and how do I say it without scaring him. Help!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Wed, 10-26-2005 - 1:00pm
Go out with someone else and do not worry about the other guy. If he comes around find if not fine...

Marie

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-21-2004
Wed, 10-26-2005 - 2:11pm

<< He made it clear that he had a busy schedule, two jobs, back to school but that he liked me and wanted to see me.>> and <>

He made it clear that he's got a lot goin' on in his life. Not everyone can prioritize having two jobs, school ... and a girlfriend (meaning, having time for a relationship, too). Therefore, if you're looking for prioritization ... he's not your guy. He may very well like you, too ... BUT, sounds like he's a better candidate for "see you when I see you" than for counting on him for dates.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-24-2005
Wed, 10-26-2005 - 7:03pm

Next guy in line, please !!!

I don't do the waiting game. Time is flying, the clock is ticking.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-28-2005
Fri, 10-28-2005 - 1:24am

Hi...

If I was you I wouldn't call him...let him call u....he told u he had a busy schd. and if he is telling the truth and likes u then he is not going to want a girl that is going to be up his ass if he is already busy(I am going through it now with my man but the sitution is reversed)
And if he likes u then he will realize that u havent called and when he does explain to him that u didnt want to intrupt his busy schd. and u were waiting to for him to call u.

If u don't hear from him in 2 weeks call him and ask him what hes been doing and why he hasnt called he might actually be busy, but if u get his voice mail leave a message and if u doesnt call u back then forget him. If u do talk to him just keep your eye open to make sure hes not a playa and dont get attached to him unless u know otherwise

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-06-2004
Fri, 10-28-2005 - 2:16am

I think I would leave him alone for a while. If he was telling the truth and he likes you, he will call. Also, this conveys the message that you are not dependent on him, meaning that you have your own life and you don't sit around waiting or him to call.

If he likes you he will keep calling, and if he never calls, then you can move on.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2005
Sun, 10-30-2005 - 1:34pm
I am going through a similar situation with a guy I have been dating for a month now. He told me in the beginning that he was busy (he works 16 hrs/per day, 5 days a week...sometimes Saturdays too). It's a mission for us to spend time together, but possible. We still managed to go out once a week and he use to call me 3 times a day during his breaks. He said he would make time for me and he has. I am guilty of sometimes cancelling my plans for him (cause I dont know when we will get to hang out again) but I like him and enjoy spending with him. A relationship is a compromise, but you shouldnt feel cheated. I told him that in life we make time for the things we want. He agreed. Now I noticed he is started to slack off by not calling or cancelling plans. Now I try to let him call me...let him take intiative. This way I know if he is still interested. When I use to call him, I would be disappointed if he didnt call back right away or was busy to hang out. And one time he had the nerve to get mad at me because he called and I already had plans and wouldnt cancel them last minute to be with him. Mind you I was wating for him to call me in the first place and decided to do my own thing without him. I think he realized I do have a life too and the world does not revolve around him. What we are doing now is he sends me his schedule and lets me know in advance when he is available and I do the same. I keep that time open for him (on standby of course, I aint nobody's fool). He's on a special project and is only working this much for a few months. If it was gonna be like this long term I would cut him cause I like being pursued and like attention. I am giving him a chance during these few months. And if he is still too busy later on... I'm gonna drop him and move on. But the bottom line is...we make time for what we want in life.