When should he tell his parents?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2005
When should he tell his parents?
6
Tue, 06-16-2009 - 2:35am

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2009
Tue, 06-16-2009 - 7:16am

A week or two after we started dating he showed me his house and his parents were there so I met them

I think the fact that this guy says he's not that serious about you is the real reason you haven't met his family. This situation would be very suspicious to me. Is this really a great guy? You don't mention anything you like about him.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2005
Tue, 06-16-2009 - 10:31pm

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-18-2006
Wed, 06-17-2009 - 10:14am

Normally when a guy has serious feelings for you, within the first few months if he thinks it's going somewhere, he'll introduce you. However, I can understand where religion would have an issue, but the main fact is that he's a little immature when it comes to relationships since you are the 1st GF he's had from what you said. All of this is new to him, so you have to give him time and room. It may be a year before he introduces you.

As far as your question, my fiance introduced me to his family a few weeks after I introduced him to mine. We started seeing each in August, met the parents in February (6 months). What was interesting was that after he came back from a family vacation less than a month after we started seeing each other, he told his mom that he found someone very special. From that point I knew that my relationship was very different from all the rest that I've ever had.

The point is that I never pushed the issue, and I didn't tell my parents till about 2 months after the fact. I was ready to bring him home after 6 months, only when I knew that this was serious.

For you, I wouldn't push the issue with him. Just let it happen if it happens, the less you bring it up, and think about it the better. It's not serious right now, but he does love you, and makes sure that everyone else knows your his GF. Remember that you are dealing with a newbie here, so give it some time, but don't let too much time lapse either.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2009
Wed, 06-17-2009 - 12:43pm

Why are you so concerned about meeting the parents?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-03-2008
Wed, 06-17-2009 - 1:59pm

bluemackerel,

I think that women often times try too hard to read between the lines. You mention early on that your last relationship lasted three years, despite the fact that your boyfriend didn't mention you to his parents for seven months. So many times we try to put meaning where there isn't any. It's not easy to deal with, but sometimes you just have to live in that grey area until things become more clear. Him not having introduced you to his parents yet might be indicative of him not being very serious, but at the same time, it could easily mean he wants to make sure he's not taking things too quickly. It's only been a few months—give him a bit more time.



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uncommononsense
I can't go back to yesterday--because I was a different person then. --L. Carroll


iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2005
Thu, 06-18-2009 - 8:25am