when should you say I love you?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-2003
when should you say I love you?
2
Mon, 05-16-2005 - 2:05pm
Ok, so here's the deal. I am mid-20s in a relationship with a great guy for the last 5 months. Everything is going great. The only thing that concerns me is that he hasn't said those three little words yet. Yes, I know I could say them first, but I have in the past and it has back-fired, and I don't want to "pressure" him into saying them, so I'd rather wait for him. My question is, how long is too long to wait? Shouldn't he have said it by now? Does this mean he doesn't? FYI....every guy I have ever dated has said it to me within the first 3 months...maybe I am spoiled. What do you think?
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2004
Mon, 05-16-2005 - 2:56pm
Well, it always depends on the relationship of course, but I think that 5 months into the relationship is definitely too soon to be saying "I love you" though some ppl probably think differently. I just don't think those words should be thrown around, and 5 months into a relationship sort of takes the meaning out of those words. I mean, how can you know whether u love someone after such a short period of time? It would take me at least a year, maybe a little less, to determine that.
I mean, basically, being in love is saying ur ready to spend the rest of your life w/ someone. are you certain about that after 5 months? i'd wait to say those deep, significant words if i were u.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-28-2005
Mon, 05-16-2005 - 6:05pm
What I think isn't going to help you much. He will say it when he feels the emotion and he feels comfortable enough to utter the words. Not a minute sooner. Kudos for not saying it first. When the right time is all relative...three months may be "right" for you, it may be waaaay too soon for him. Good luck. Hope you get what you want soon. Becky