Where is that someone?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2005
Where is that someone?
4
Thu, 07-21-2005 - 9:21am
I am 33 years old. I have had one 8 year relationship which ended 7 years ago and was not a pleasant experience.
I have met so many men in my life but no one with the special connection to go further with.
People are I believe genuinly surprised I do not have a boyfriend.
I feel humbley rich as a person in other area's of my life.
The only person I have felt a greater love for is in love with someone else.
I am nubile- and frustrated now.
Cosmos Please tell me.
What is the coo?
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2004
Thu, 07-21-2005 - 10:03am

When you say you've met many men but none had a special connection to go further with, what do you mean exactly? How long do you date a person before you decide there's nothing special and move on?

I didn't feel anything special when I met the man who I'd end up marrying. Over time as we dated though, we became close friends and the bond grew. He eventually became someone extremely special. I remember now all my friends telling me that if I didn't feel sparks at the beginning, then I should leave. I'm sure glad now that I didn't listen.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2005
Thu, 07-21-2005 - 10:45am

Well,
I have had many male friends which I have been out with for periods. But actually now you say about the dating; even though I get whistles when walking down street and when I meet men I seem to get a positive response, men flirt with me and told at work and in leisure by men I am a good woman, I have only been asked out by two men in the past year who are too old for me. I am talking 50's.
When i say connection I mean a chemistry.
Now at my age there are a lot of men already in partnerships. I am thinking that may be some assume I am already with boyfriend. And sometimes meet a person on one occasion and think they seem nice but am not asked out.
I was hoping I would meet some one as a friend and to develop into something more intimate but this has not happenned.
I had a friend-the one I fell in love with. He had come to me and said he wanted to see how it would be with me. He has been in a relationship for a while which was not sounding good as he talked to me from time to time. I knew he always liked me and we saw each other for a while. But I worried it was too soon for him and I did not want to get messed about, and may be am guilty of pushing him into a corner of telling me he is indeed very much in love with his ex even though all the problems they were having. But really he is a little messed up at the mo. I did consider waiting for him but I think we have both ruined that now.
The wierd thing is when I first met him 6 years ago I thought he may be my future husband. Where does that come from? Wierd. Any forget him. Even though I like him. I wish him all the best.
Oh oh oh.
I seem to have good relationships with some men but only at a friendship level. There have been asked for me for more but I have not wanted a physical relationship them. And I feel quite a sensual woman for some one.
?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2004
Thu, 07-21-2005 - 11:06am
You know you don't have to wait to be asked out. If there's a single man that you find interesting, why not ask him out for coffee or something?
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2004
Thu, 07-21-2005 - 11:29am
She can ask him out but it doesn't always lead to anything.
I've done it in the past and he gladly accepted, unbeknownst to me, he had a steady girlfriend.
So my theory is if he aint asking, there's a reason. It usually is but shyness is a cop out.
It's just all about timing, patience and luck, I've learned. Some are just more quick than others to find that special one.