Your Thoughts

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2006
Your Thoughts
12
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 11:08am
Here's the situation, met a guy online, went for a date - had a REALLY good time, we've been seeing each other for about 1 month. I should mention that he's been separated about 1.5 yrs, and lives in his own place (I've been there) working on the divorce. We don't meet on weekends cause he has children (I don't). Here's the thing, he keeps posting ads looking for dates, although when I'm with him, I feel that he really likes me (the little things he does), I know its only been a month and I shouldn't stake a claim, but the 1st time I saw the ad, I felt like I was sucker punched. I don't know whether I should bring it up or let it slide till we get more serious. Btw, I really do like the guy very much. your thoughts?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-2005
Thu, 02-23-2006 - 2:23pm

Except that I am notorious for giving people the benefit of the doubt.

In doing this do you find that you're confused, hurt, disappointed, disillusioned, or not getting what you want out of life in some large percentage of situations, circumstances, and relationships?

If so that's because benefit of the doubt is really "I want what I want and I want to pretend you are that and want it to until my head buried in the sand with my butt wiggling in the air with delight at my delusional denial- I get kicked, real hard...and my head pops up".

Get prepared to get "confused" in your conversation.

Because you're asking him what he wants....and you're going to get the equivalent of "I don't know".

You're going to get upset that he won't "answer honestly" - because you can't accept the answer for what it is. Indecision is a decision. It's a decision not to decide or take action rightnow because how it is right now suits me right now.

Erin
quickblade14@hotmail.com

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2005
Thu, 02-23-2006 - 9:17pm
When I met my boyfriend, I was doing the online thing as well.

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