1st DATE- Should I pay for the dinner??
Find a Conversation
| Fri, 08-04-2006 - 1:17am |
Here....
This guy wrote to me earlier today. I replied, we chatted back and forth thru Match a couple of times. He invited me to to go Tom Petty's concert this coming Saturday. I accepted. He suggested to meet at a restaurant, get a bite to eat then proceed to the concert. I overlooked his profile at first. I now realized he indicates he has no kid. I prefer to date someone with grown kid (I'm 49yo) because I have 4 (they live on their own).
My questions are:
1. The restaurant and the concert hall is about 5 miles stretch. Should I tell him I'd rather drive my own car and follow him.
2. He lives kinda far from where I live (35 miles), and he has no kid...so I don't know if I want to see him again or not. In case I'm not, I don't want to take advantage of him, thus, I was thinking...since he pays for the ticket, should I offer to pay for the dinner?
Give me advice please....
April

Hi April and welcome to the board! IMO, let him pay for dinner, he invited you, not the other way around. Re driving...since you don't know him yet, I think driving your own car is an excellent idea!
Just have a good time and enjoy the evening!
Katie
I don't think it would be strange for you to drive yourself to the concert. It's the safe thing to do after all. And yes, if he's paying for the tickets, I think it would be a nice gesture for you to offer dinner.
I'm just a little confused, though. So what if he doesn't have kids? It's not HIS fault, and really doesn't say anything about him whatsoever. Am I missing something?
My feeling is that the person doing the asking, generally does the paying. However, I'm also of the feeling that if there isn't any chemistry, I'll definitely offer/insist on paying my portion.
Some guys will refuse to let a woman pay. In that case, that's his choice. But he shouldn't feel slighted if a second date wasn't in the cards (in your eyes, at least). :)
IMO, the person who did the asking does the paying.
Thanks so much for all the replies. I truly appreciate it.
I did offer to pay for the dinner but he declined. So I done my part
As far as the kiddo thing goes...I once engaged with a man who has no kid. He got jealous when my kids came to visit me. My kids are grown, they didn't come too often. When I came to visit them, he either was cold with me or said some sarcastic remarks. On top of that, he didn't have enough patience to listen when I told him about my kids. Thus, it's just my preference to date someone with kid(s). I think we can relate it more.
About the date last night. He told me he wanted to see me again. He offered to cook dinner for me, which I just smiled and said nothing. I know it's not going to work because he bad mouthed about the "majority" women on Match. He said, women posted photos which were taken about 10 years ago, they were fat in reality, they ugly, they lied blah bah blah... Even though, he's not fat, but his photos were clearly not up-do-date ones.
Another blow was, the concert was outdoor, and it's pretty humid. He tried to be cute with the woman sitting in front of us. He kept tapping on her shoulder and asked for her opinion about Tom Petty's latest CD. He took a paper fan and fanned her. He tried to rub my back and my elbow. I just moved a little away from him and enjoyed the music. Grrr...
Next...