after how many dates...?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-17-2004
after how many dates...?
4
Wed, 10-26-2005 - 10:42pm

Hi,

I am just curious - if everything goes well between you and your date, you have good connections/chemistry, and you're into each other (at least from the way he acts), how long would you wait for him to ask for exclusivity before giving up? Would you ever start that discussion with him?

J.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-17-2004
Fri, 10-28-2005 - 1:52pm
The previous message was for online dating, btw.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2005
Fri, 10-28-2005 - 2:25pm
I don't know if I would put a specific number on that scenario. But I know what you mean. I think I would wait and see how things are progressing. Do we communicate each day, are there long lapses btw dates. Has he mentioned seeing other people, has he taken his profile down. but if you are looking for a number, (for me) I would say anytime you pass the 2-3 month mark of dating. That may be too long for some people, but for me I want to take things slow, and make sure there is no one else out there that I want to date.... But it's individual and I don't see a problem with bringing it up casually and just touching on the subject to feel him out.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-17-2004
Fri, 10-28-2005 - 2:49pm

Hey,

Thanks for your reply. I'm still in the initial stage so it's way too early to be thinking about exclusivity. Nevertheless, it's good to have some idea of how things work for OLD. :) I am worried sometimes that my expectation for OLD might be too high due to lack of experience, and that I will end up getting hurt. Having that realization myself, I am still a hopeless optimist and just hope that things will work out fine.

J.

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 10-28-2005 - 4:58pm

About two months of dating steadily, about 2-3 times a week, is my comfort zone. And I'm not comfortable having sex until we agree to exclusivity.

Sheri