Am I being too sensitive
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| Sun, 01-14-2007 - 10:33pm |
I've exchanged two or three extremely brief e-mails with this guy on LL. Nothing much at all. Then today I got this message. Personally I find it a total turn off when a guy I haven't even met feels the need to tell me how passionate and physical he is. He has also mentioned in two of three short e-mails that he will press to meet. I have no problem with meeting someone shortly after chatting but I don't like being pressured. It sends up a red flag regarding control issues.
So, the message is below. Am I being overly critical or is this out of line for someone I've barely corresponded with.
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I am going to tell you a little about myself. I have been separated/divorced for two years. I am very close to my daughters and have always been the primary caregiver. But my ex is also very important caregiver in their lives. My daughters are also talented and intelligent and beautiful.
I have this vision of my next relationship filled with passion and hunger. Yes, of course, sexual desires, but that is only a small piece of this vision. Passion to me is more than the physical aspects (although I am a lusty male after all - lol). I want to want and be wanted emotionally, intellectually and spiritually. I want to be able to provide positive support and receive positive support. I want to build esteem and not destroy it. And, just as important, I need to see this passion in your eyes too. I want to help each other through the rest of our lives. Yes, I am a romantic.
My vision of that perfect day off into the future would be located in sunny, hot somewhereelse playing a game of golf, then cuddling up on a hammock talking about anything, everything or maybe nothing, then off to tour the countryside, a supper in a nice quaint restaurant teasing each other in so many different emotional planes, walking down a beach watching a sunset and holding hands. Can you see that as a possibility?
Do I expect all this in the beginning??? Not at all. The beginning is an exploration of minds and personalities. I don't have any expectations or limitations. I believe that the right relationship will evolve naturally in its own timeframe
So are you interested in meeting? I am not an email fan. We can learn so much about each other in person through one glass of wine or coffee then through a 100 emails.
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Blech...gag me ;-).
I would be totally turned off by this email although it sounds like for different reasons than you would be!
Sheri
For me I suggest a phone call first before I want to meet someone. However I can understand wanting to meet if the communication flows.
Pressured? All I read is him saying he is ASKING for a meeting, expressing his preferences (not an email fan), and him having no expectations.
Mark
BARFFFF!!!
Guys who talk about being "lusty" and all that in the first few emails automatically get deleted in my book.
And maybe I'm being harsh but to me he sounds like the kind of guy who *thinks* he knows what to say to the women to get them into bed (you know, walks on the beach, sunset, yadda, yadda, yadda). It makes me want to yak.
Sounds scary - that's all I have to say!!!
I'm sure there's someone more genuine, realistic and kind out there for you. :)
Pink
I replied to his message today. I said that getting a message using hunger, lust, intimacy and sexual desire, and a few others in a single message to someone you've never met is a bit unnerving. I wished him luck and bowed out.
Thanks very much for the feedback. I sometimes wonder if I'm being too picky and know that sometimes intent is lost without the tone and inflection so it was very helpful to get other opinions.