Are Online Relationships Real?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2004
Are Online Relationships Real?
5
Thu, 12-29-2005 - 5:12pm

I was wondering if online realationship are real or not. A few friends of mine think that they are not real relationships especially if they are over long distances (ie separated by a few states or more) and no chance of meeting up and because of that they can't be real relationships. They cite things such as the in person contact (physical) isn't there, they could be telling you anything online/the phone and it could be all lies, and various other things that they feel are important parts of a healthy relationship. I myself am not sure. And no one out their start to worry about me or critize me cause I'm not in an online relationship. I ask this just as a curiousity and I have a friend who was involved in one a few years ago. I don't want to offend anyone by my question but I would seriously like to get some options on this matter.

Take care everyone have hope the holidays are treating you well!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Thu, 12-29-2005 - 5:23pm
I think you'll find that most people out here will definitely not be offended but rather will agree 100% with your friends that an online relationship is not real until you meet in person. You only know what the online person shows you about themselves and very often "chemistry" online or over the phone does not translate to real life. It can but usually it doesn't. I think your friends have a healthy grasp of the situation in thinking that because they have never met someone that lives several states away, that they are not in a relationship with this person.

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Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 12-29-2005 - 6:18pm

Well, an online relationship is "real", in the sense that it exists. But it is necessarily a *limited* relationship, because it's impossible to have all the elements that make up a healthy romantic relationship without spending time together in person.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-01-2005
Thu, 12-29-2005 - 7:49pm
I'm not sure it's a great way to have a relationship. I do know that I couldn't be in a relationship without having met the person many, many times.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-02-2005
Fri, 12-30-2005 - 10:26am

If there is no chance of meeting then it's purely and simply an online relationship, or if you prefer, a real online relationship. If there is a chance of meeting then I think it becomes one aspect of a real relationship.

IMHO: Purely online relationships are an interactive fantasy.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
Fri, 12-30-2005 - 5:34pm

>>IMHO: Purely online relationships are an interactive fantasy.<<

I totally agree with that. Maybe I'm old fashioned but, until I meet someone in person, I don't feel any real connection with them. Maintaining conversations by IM or e-mail can be entertaining and fun, but I never have a true feel or attraction for a person until we've met (and often, it takes several meetings for that to develop).

I get incredibly frustrated with the guys (in my own city who COULD meet in person) who just want to IM incessently. I get bored and move on if they don't want to meet face-to-face.

AJ, enjoying life with C.