Back in the saddle-wish I'd stayed off

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Back in the saddle-wish I'd stayed off
11
Mon, 09-12-2005 - 2:41pm

Sigh... OK, after 8 months on a semi-hiatus, I went on an OLD last night and I had to delurk to share. I think it will be therapeudic because this made me remember why I hate OLD. OK, so this guy on Match winked, I winked back. He sent an email, I responded. He seemed nice enough - intelligent, OK sense of humor... overall OK.

We move to the phone. Phone convos are not great - not much to talk about. But everyone says, bad phone convos don't necessarily mean bad in person, but... So Labor Day weekend, I was in Okla for a game, my friends took me out for my birthday Sunday and on Monday, I had to catch up. I'd mentioned "I might try to call on Sunday" but I didn't because I was busy. So he calls Tuesday which was my actual b-day and I was in the car and didn't feel like talking to him (the doubt had started). So he leaves an awkward message about how the phone convos haven't been great but that he thinks there can be chemistry in person even if there isn't on the phone (hmm, has he been reading the board??). I call the next day and get VM and say you're right, let's try to meet. He calls Thursday and we set up a coffee meet on Sunday - place TBD. He calls back half an hour later and says, "I get the feeling that you're not really into this so if you'd like to back out, that's OK." Yadda, yadda. I'm like, "Huh? OOOOO-K" but tell him that I said I'd meet him so I'll meet him. He then says, "OK, great. I got the answer I wanted so I'll call you tomorrow with the place." Again, I'm like, huh?? the answer he wanted? But whatever. He doesn't call back Friday but instead calls back Saturday during my football game! AAACK (he knows I am an OU fan). And he still says, "there's a Starbucks here but I don't have the address so I'll call back with the address. By this time, I REALLY don't want to meet but he calls back with the address and we met.

OK, I walk into the Starbucks to find a guy who is at least 2 inches shorter than I am and I am wearing sandals. That's another thing - he's wearing sandals. I'm not a big fan of guys' sandals, but I can deal. But the icky thing - his toenails are really long! Blech!! It was like a car wreck - you don't want to stare, but you can't help it. I was so grossed out. He was also balding, paunchy and had wierd lips. Conversation was OK but superficial. Absolutely no chemistry. I'd already given myself the "I am meeting friends at 8 for dinner so..." when he'd called to try to push back to 7:30 because he wasn't done with his laundry. So at 7:55, I mention that I have to leave. He says OK and we do. He gushes about what a great time he had and how he would like to do it again. After a very awkward arm pat and a half-hearted "ummm, OK???" from me, I get in my car and get the heck out. He emails me this morning again saying how great a time he had and how he wants to do it again really soon.

So I guess it comes down to the uncomfortable email "Thanks but on thinking about it, I just don't think we are a match." Buh-bye and block. Better than a phone call, right?

131.gif image by y_baros th5K.gif image by jade_simo

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Mon, 09-12-2005 - 3:01pm
LOL Ick!!!! I'm sure I'll have some similar stories to share sometime soon! :)

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-01-2005
Mon, 09-12-2005 - 3:30pm
I hope you stay out of lurkerdon.....Survivor and Amazing Race are getting ready to start soon!

CL-Truewild1969

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-03-2004
Mon, 09-12-2005 - 3:38pm

Oh, vex, that's so awful it's funny! I met a man for coffee once who had long fingernails. Yuck!!

Always fun to read your posts.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-27-2003
Mon, 09-12-2005 - 3:43pm

Vex, EWWW on toenail guy, but it is good to see a post from you again. Hopefully, your next meet will bring more favorable results.

All the best,
Libra

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2004
Mon, 09-12-2005 - 4:12pm
Vex - I've got mixed feelings on this one. I sympathize with the awful date because I've been there (as have most of us), but if it took Mr. Long Toenails to get you back here posting, I'd like to shake his hand (metaphorically speaking, of course - wouldn't want to take a chance on the fingernails).
Welcome back!
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2004
Mon, 09-12-2005 - 4:31pm

Glad to see you back and posting, Vex. I'm sorry you had such a bad date, but I enjoyed reading your story. Remember that when you have those train-wreck type dates, the only place to go next time is up.

Hope to see you around more and posting.

Eric

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2005
Mon, 09-12-2005 - 5:24pm

ROFL!!! Oh my, this post was hilarious!! LOL....cracking up!

Vexer hw, I feel your pain though, but stay positive! This truly was a good laugh though!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-27-2005
Mon, 09-12-2005 - 6:04pm

You mean olding?

Is everything ok with you?

edit* I just read your post*

Im really sorry to hear that CGUN :(




Edited 9/12/2005 6:05 pm ET ET by gal_moonlight
We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Mon, 09-12-2005 - 6:23pm

Thanks everyone for the empathy and the welcome back wishes! I knew that if anyone could appreciate it, it would be you guys. carrie, you had me worried there for a second - I thought you were actually going to find something GOOD about the actual meet! LOL!

Well, I just sent the dreaded see ya email. I was referred to a great way of saying it by another old poster - "this is not the connection I'm looking for". I love that! It takes the responsibility on yourself but makes it really clear that it ain't gonna happen!! Now I just hope I don't hear anything back. That's even more uncomfortable. Why would anyone pursue things or ask why when someone rejects them with the "I just don't think we are a match" email? Glutton for punishment?

131.gif image by y_baros th5K.gif image by jade_simo

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 09-12-2005 - 7:21pm

Welcome back...too bad about the icky date, but those make the best stories ;-).

It sounds like you sent the email...I would use your block button right away rather than give him the chance to respond. Do you really need to know whether he did or not?

Sheri

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