Bumming out re OLD

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2004
Bumming out re OLD
2
Tue, 05-31-2005 - 9:46am

Maybe I just need a break, but OLD is really starting to depress me. I've recently had some disappointing first meets (talk about people who looked NOTHING like their photos), combined with a string of "keep looking" responses to my winks. I pride myself on rolling with the punches but maybe summer would be a good time to give the keyboard a rest. It certainly wouldn't hurt me to get out more, although I can't say that other methods of attempting to meet someone have been any more successful. Or, here's a novel thought, it might be refreshing to stop obsessing about meeting, dating, winks, whatever, at least for the summer. I can always resume my obsessing in the fall :)

Just had to vent to people who I know understand where I'm coming from. One thing I could never give up is this board.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-16-2004
Tue, 05-31-2005 - 10:11am

I think summer is the best time to be OLD-ing -- because there is so much to do (versus the colder Northeast winters).

I've had people who I met that looked nothing like their pictures. I basically sat there the whole time wondering if someone else had shown up. In the end for those people it really didn't matter because I found so long as I had "pre-screened" to make sure we had lots in common (VERY VERY VERY important with OLD) -- that I would still have a good time meeting them.

Overally the things that I spent too long screwing around with were:

1. Not being very specific on what I was looking for - age range, interests, kids/no-kids, distance, etc.

2. Emailing people who clearly were not matches - which I could tell by their basic profile information.

3. Worrying about failing or having bad meets -- once I stopped worrying about the bad ones - the whole process became so much easier. It's a fact of life that you're going to click with people via email/phone and be repulsed by their personality when you meet in person (and this works both ways - both you'll have these experiences and those meeting you).

I would say overall the # 1 thing is to get good at failure/rejection. Once you are comfortable with that - you can OLD to your hearts content.

I'm also VERY guarded with anyone until I get to know them and can judge them by their actions.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2005
Tue, 05-31-2005 - 3:03pm


I totally agree with you. I thin I obsess too much too. But how do you let it go and really stop looking. My friend claims as soon as I stop looking then I'll meet someone b/c that's what happened with her. She wasn't single 2 months and met a guy at a boat show. Now they're dating and things are good so far.
Sometimes are tougher than others but everyday I think i'm getting better at it. I love this board, can't give it up either.
take care and good luck

LilRocket