Butterflies.....

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2005
Butterflies.....
4
Wed, 09-28-2005 - 11:25am

Hey-

Let's see... I am supposed to have a First Meet with Bachelor #3, tomorrow. We are meeting for lunch. He FINALLY asked me out... I was beginning to wonder about him. Our phone conversations are usually every evening or every other... we talk very comfortably for at least 30 to 40 minutes... the time just flies.

But I don't get the same butterfly feeling with him, that I do with Bachelor #1... and I think it's for two reasons... 1) we haven't met, so I'm not sure if there is a spark as far as looks go... 2) I have been dating Bachelor 1 longer. But I think there is a third, but I'm not sure. When we talk, it's like we have known each other for years and just getting reaquainted...not a bad thing, but it almost feels like he is a relative or a really close friend. I don't have that feeling of chemistry between us. And we have been talking on the phone for over two weeks now.

I guess I am wondering if this is normal or if maybe it's just "not" there? Or am I putting too much emphasis on Bachelor #1? I don't think I am putting too much emphasis on Bachelor 1,... but it's hard to tell- I need to know from people looking on the outside.
Let me know if you all need any background info on either of these two guys...

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2005
In reply to: kae_n_me
Wed, 09-28-2005 - 12:16pm

You aren't going to know if there's a "spark" there until you meet IRL.

But I think it's nice that you've established a comfort level on the phone. That should help ease first date jitters.


iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2005
In reply to: kae_n_me
Wed, 09-28-2005 - 12:30pm
Maybe, or maybe not. I tend to date a certain type of black men... if they appear or sound uneducated, it's a turn off. He sounds like he is educated but not formaly... does that make sense? And they have to have a sense of proffesionalism to them... no baggy pants or over large shirts or laces untied...which I won't know until I meet him.. but in is voice I feel that there is something lacking....oh well we will see.


Edited 9/28/2005 12:31 pm ET ET by kae_n_me
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2005
In reply to: kae_n_me
Wed, 09-28-2005 - 12:38pm

Yes, that makes sense to me.

My grandmother only went to 6th grade. But she had beautiful diction and an excellent vocabulary, not to mention incredible common sense. She was very (self) educated, but not formally.


iVillage Member
Registered: 10-26-2004
In reply to: kae_n_me
Thu, 09-29-2005 - 12:15am

Hi KnM,

What you are describing might be the start of something good. It might mean that you all are a lot alike, and that is why you feel comfortable and familiar talking with him. As the others said, meet and see...that is all you can do, and you will know it right away, won't you, if there is chemistry? TM and I are very much alike, but different in the ways we need to be.

I think you are looking for a level of class and sophistication, add a dash of charm and sense of humor, and mix with compassion and honesty--and that Is your man! Hey.....that is My TM too! Keep on, it will happen--he is out there, and I hope you find him soon.

4-1-1 us!

Truly,
Cupcake