Can somebody please kick my butt??! ARRG

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-06-2005
Can somebody please kick my butt??! ARRG
3
Mon, 01-01-2007 - 5:55pm

I just want to vent here...

I met this guy online... we talked a couple of times on the phone, and we seem to really connect... had a lot of stuff in common, etc...

We decided to meet up yesterday on New Year's Eve. We both had parties to go to at night, so we decided to meet up in the afternoon, and if we'll like each other, we would decide to go to one party together...

Well, long story short: we met up, liked each other, made out, had sex, and stayed in bed instead of hitting any New Year's Eve Party.
I know, I know... I shouldnt have give in, but at that moment, it just felt great... and now I'm sooooooooooo mad at myself... coz I was looking for a relationship not an one-night-stand... and of course, knowing that guys probably wont call you after you already had sex with them on the first date... I'm just mad at myself... just knowing that there is probably no chance that he is gonna call afterwards, now that he got everything he probably wanted...

Sorry, just want to vent... and thanks for listening...

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Mon, 01-01-2007 - 7:17pm
There's no real "probably" because every case is different. Don't lump your situation in with every other one. Yeah, it probably wasn't the BEST decision to do that, but relationships DO develop from situations like this so why not wait and see. If you don't hear from him again, then you'll know. But give him a couple days to call. You can always shoot him an email to say hi but don't force anything. Good luck - I hope that it works out - you never know! And don't beat yourself up - it doesn't do any good. Just remember it for next time.

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Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 01-01-2007 - 7:19pm

Well, it sounds like you're doing a pretty darn good job of kicking your own butt, so I won't add to that!

What's done is done...you can't change it, all you can do is decide NOT to do the same thing in the future if that behavior causes you stress.

I was married to a man I slept with the night we met--so it's not necessarily fatal to having a serious LTR. That said, I wouldn't recommend it and don't do that any more...but if it's meant to be, it'll work out regardless of how quickly you slept together. But I think you can increase the chances of things working out if you don't sleep together right away, plus you don't go through as much of the "is he going to call again" angst if you wait until you know each other pretty well.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Mon, 01-01-2007 - 7:27pm

Just wanted to throw this in there - it's not necessarily true that a guy won't call you if you have sex on a first date.

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