CL ghosts reappear - what to do?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2006
CL ghosts reappear - what to do?
10
Thu, 05-11-2006 - 11:36am

OK, CL is a bit different because when they email you, they don't know who you are.

heather 5-18-10
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2005
Thu, 05-11-2006 - 12:03pm
I don't know.
 
 
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 05-11-2006 - 12:42pm

I would ignore him. Unless your ad was SO different that there's no way he would have recognized you from it, then you didn't make enough of an impression on him (I mean, I answer a lot of ads, but I at least remember the guys I exchange more than one email with and recognize their ads when they repost them, ya know? Unless of course they lie in their reposting about key details like age and location). And that of course isn't a reflection on YOU, as I'm sure you know ;-)...he's just not worth it.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2006
Thu, 05-11-2006 - 12:43pm
Exactly - that's why I haven't responded yet and don't know if I will.
heather 5-18-10
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2006
Thu, 05-11-2006 - 12:56pm

I suppose, but my ad is quite different this time (I forgot to save the original and it

heather 5-18-10
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 05-11-2006 - 12:59pm

Well, if you'll be wondering "what if", then respond. But don't be surprised if the exact same thing happens.

And FWIW, I've found that posting CL ads on the weekends get a much better response.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2005
Thu, 05-11-2006 - 1:20pm

Well I too just posted an ad on CL yesterday and got about 20 hits. I don't know but the quality of men on CL has greatly improved in my opinion. Out of those 20, I received 2 emails from 2 guys who I had chatted with before. Anyway I hit delete. I didn't bother responding to them. The only difference is the first time I posted a picture and this time I did not. I actually like the idea of sending my pic later. I have about 4-5 guys that have responded positively (meaning not sexually) and we'll see how it goes. Of course, I only need ONE, but it is a numbers game.

Personally, I would not bother wasting my time with him. I would just ignore or click DELETE.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2006
Thu, 05-11-2006 - 1:22pm

Thanks Sheri - for both the advice and the tip on CL posting times.

heather 5-18-10
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2005
Thu, 05-11-2006 - 1:31pm

You know I had two guys who initially wrote me who had nothing in their email. Both of these guys I gave a chance too. I started dialogue to see if it would make them open up and respond more. One just responded with one-liners and didn't forward any questions. I ignored him after 2-3 emails. The other, we were able to keep a constant chat going -- but I kept my emails brief as well as he. Meaning answered the question and sent another question.

I just think you should give the guys who are sending emails a chance. Meaning if they didn't state anything about themselves, well send an initial email asking them if they are from your area, and go from there. I personally hate those "tell me about yourself" type emails; and prefer the asking questions/chat approach (if that makes sense).

Guys with no pic -- respond and ask for a pic.

Guy w/hot pic -- geez, go ahead and write him.

Sorry cl-vexer, but if you are expecting more of an initial contact from a stranger, you will be disappointed. Just like these guys don't know you and we ALL know they are being contacted or contacting other people (and some of them psychotic) so everybody is playing "cautiously!"

Oviously the guy who didn't call could have met someone else or got busy or whatever. I can understand that but you didn't make too much of an impression if he didn't retain the number and try calling you again later.

I say "think outside the box" and contact the other guys! You have nothing to lose!

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 05-11-2006 - 1:37pm

If you write to him, I'd probably say something like "Hi we actually corresponded for a while back in , but then I didn't hear from you. If you're still interested in talking, call me at xxxxxxx".

And I totally hear you about being beat down...if one of the guys I'm seeing now doesn't pan out, I'm not going back online for a while, that's for sure!

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-01-2005
Thu, 05-11-2006 - 7:51pm

Honestly, I'd ignore him.

I know I've had guys reply to more than one of my CL ads and most of the time, I wasn't impressed by them the frst time for whatever reason. Yes, some I honestly forget about, too. I just think it's easier for all involved to let stuff like this just pass by.