Good Morning all. I just wanted to post a question or poll for a discussion. I am curious to know how all of you feel about two particular topics. I want you to compare the two and tell me how they may differ or seem to be related.
On line dating has its stereotypes attached to it, and it doesnt seem to be the normal way to date, but seems to be becoming more of a trend in today's scene. Now, take the reality shows. The Bachelor, or the Bachelorette, Joe Millionaire, Married byu America, and many more... Now, obviously the television industry itself is based on ratings and has no real concern for finding someone a mate. I am not sure how each couple has turned out, but it seems that the Bachelorette (Trista and Ryan) are the only two that are actually going through with marriage. Now, my comparison questions are as followed:
1.) How do you compare these types of match making or dating techniques?
2.) Do you feel that on line dating, match ads and such or better and more serious than any of the reality shows for match-mating or visa versa?
So, that is my two comparison questions and feel free to add anything else you want to say about the topics at hand. I just thought I would bring this discussion to the table, since I am curious what you all think about it. I personally feel that the shows are not really trying to find matches, only ratings. I notice it is more about money than anything else. Even with the MR. Firestone, Bachelor himself...he acts as if he is really looking to find "the one", but it seems that being on television with all those women and the publicity he is bringing to "Firestone" with his debut, is more important. I guess some people get into these shows, which is entertaining I agree, but the morals and basis of why they are doing them, is beyond me. Anywho...thats me, now your turn. Tell me what you think!
Gail
1.) How do you compare these types of match making or dating techniques? I think this is all just a show. Not real match making. It is purely based on ratings and reality TV is just gotten extremely outrageous with all the shows. I have gotten caught up into watching them but would much prefer something on the Discovery channel or Biography.
2.) Do you feel that on line dating, match ads and such or better and more serious than any of the reality shows for match-mating or visa versa? I thinking dating sites are a bit better because you can have real conversation it is more intimate on a one on one and not 20, 10, or even 5 others at the same time. You may have to go through plenty of duds online but hey I'd rather have a guy I can be one on one with and talk to and see how he is. On these shows of course you don't get to see temper etc.. Which are big for me. I like to ask then watch. They never have to come home one day from work and be stressed and these women are talking to these guys. That's my biggest thing how is he when he gets back home when day to day life comes to part they leave the show not really knowing the person fully when online you can talk then meet etc.. And find out what you want which is better because some show their true colors early and some late but you will see it and not after fighting for him with 20 other women.
Good question
Marie
2.) Do you feel that on line dating, match ads and such or better and more serious than any of the reality shows for match-mating or visa versa?
I don't think you can compare - because there are so many different ways to approach meeting someone through an on line dating site, a chat room, someone just sending you an instant message. To me it is not dating until you meet in person so "on line dating" to me means just the way you initially meet so that you can set up an inperson meeting shortly after - so it has nothing to do with reality shows since I am not falling in love with the fantasy of a person (as I see it) or his "image" in the way he types, uses words as a writer or talks on the phone.
For those people who believe that a romantic relationship can be carried on just through typing and talking on the phone, I would say there is more of a means of comparison - both have the large risk of the huge fantasy element, the sense of urgency and pining that can often be mistaken for true feelings of love and caring, and also the sense that it is so much easier to just walk away when the going gets tough - the people on the reality shows can just throw in the towel if the other person as much sneezes wrong, and a person who just instant messages or talks on the phone knows deep down that cutting all ties is so much easier than if there is a solid in person relationship where you see the other person on a regular and consistent basis.
I do not include cyber friendships in this category - I do believe a friendship can be developed - a close friendship - through just being penpals and phone calls - I had a pen pal for over 15 years and we really bonded. But for a romantic committed relationship, that is a whole different story to me.
Just my thoughts - good questions!
Gail
gail
gail
Deena's post made me realise with some shame that i was welching on my part of the promise (since he is taking time off his medical practice and spending all the money and flying out here) and i wrote him an email saying "I'm still here." Just wanted to say thanks for reminding me feelings ARE formed, and even if they're not totally realistic, okay, they are still strong enough for one to get hurt...
Sal.