confusing stuff

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-31-2004
confusing stuff
8
Wed, 03-30-2005 - 11:41pm
Um, I had a first official date with this guy that a friend of mine set me up with.
I don’t know what to think. I am very very attracted to him looks –wise but there is absolutely nothing else in-common including upbringing and intellect. At times I felt that I was afraid to ask him certain questions so not to make him feel uncomfortable because he may not know what I am talking about. I stared at him a lot because he is just so good looking and he has a lot of sexual chemistry going on but the conversation was lame. That is very interesting because in the past I would only be attracted to guys that are smarter than me. I am not sure where to take this from here. What do you think?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2005
In reply to: ivos2004
Wed, 03-30-2005 - 11:44pm

Thank your friend for the fix up and be honest - say he was cute but as far as relationship material he's not what you're looking for - you simply didn't feel a connection - i wouldn't say anything about his intellect but by say you didn't have a connection is a nicer way of letting him down.



Cheers,
SP

The Small Peanut

 
 
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2005
In reply to: ivos2004
Thu, 03-31-2005 - 10:55am
About 2/3 years ago, I was dating a real hottie, but he was dumber than a bag of hair. I couldn't take it anymore and broke it off. He never quite understood why, though.


iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2004
In reply to: ivos2004
Thu, 03-31-2005 - 10:59am
I couldn't handle a person that was dumb no matter how good looking.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2003
In reply to: ivos2004
Thu, 03-31-2005 - 11:28am
I guess it depends what you're looking for. At this point in my life, it would be nice to meet someone I was physically attracted to. I'd probably go with the physical, knowing all along it wasn't going to lead anywhere long-term. But that's where I am in my life. I'd at least have to explore a little further and see if the chemistry meant anything. It's just so rare I find someone I feel that with. Usually it's the other way around -- the ones I really respect and like just don't do a thing for me physically!
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-10-2004
In reply to: ivos2004
Fri, 04-01-2005 - 1:56pm

I'm one of those who can't stand someone who isn't at least *somewhat* smart. I'm not a nuclear scientist or anything; I'm eligible for membership in Mensa, but I've never joined because I'd probably be on the low end of that particular group.

But I have dated at least once incredibly hot gal who was also incredibly stupid. I mean, we're talking "how do you remember to breathe" stupid. And despite the fact that she was uber-hot (we're talking super-model hot), I couldn't STAND being with her.

So I nailed her once and then dumped her.

No, no, no, just kidding. I didn't go out with her past the one time (I'd spent other social time around her prior, so I knew that it wasn't just nerves- she was truly stupid) and even though I would've liked to have seen her naked, and probably could have (she was pretty into me), I just couldn't stand it.

I predict that anyone who dates someone strictly for physical stuff will eventually get tired of them. You've just GOT to have some kind of mental/intellectual connection, or it won't last.

But then again, that's me. Maybe if you got a really smart, funny, entertaining set of friends to keep you mentally going, you could handle Mr Stupid. :)

In all seriousness, there is one thing worth noting: There's different kinds of intelligence. Someone might be very book-smart, but be hopeless when it comes to sports or pop culture or something like that. What matters is that someone matches us in OUR areas of expertise.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2005
In reply to: ivos2004
Fri, 04-01-2005 - 2:01pm
sounds like the guy I dated - uber hot, but if I put my ear next to his, I could hear a dial tone.


iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2003
In reply to: ivos2004
Fri, 04-01-2005 - 4:35pm
ROTFL

 

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-31-2004
In reply to: ivos2004
Fri, 04-01-2005 - 5:22pm
Thanks everyone!
I think I will give this person a shot. He isn't just good looking but he is also a very nice person. I just think that he is a very different type of guy from what I am used to dating. I do think he was a bit shy. And, yes Niceguy, I would like to see him naked :) but I will be sure to take my time before getting there.. (bike guy episode is still rather fresh and embarrassing).