Could he have left any more quickly...?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2005
Could he have left any more quickly...?
28
Sun, 03-18-2007 - 10:05am

St. Paddy's Day was a lot of fun. A nice dinner followed by jazz club, back to my place, and R and I crashed, after some kisses (but no sex of any kind, just making out). It was a lot of fun. He asked a lot of q's and seems to like me. He was discussing where he'd like to take me for dinner the next time, what kind of wedding I want, what my pet peeves re guys are, etc. We drank a bit, but nothing got too out of hand.

I woke up this morning slightly hung over, so I got in the shower and closed the BR door so as not to wake him up.I got out of the shower and he was up and said he had to head out cause they were delivering mulch to his house some time today. It seemed kind of abrupt to me. He gave me a really nice hug and said he'd call later and I am sure he will, but no coffee ore breakfast? I am maybe reading too much into this, but it seemed almost like he was raring to take off, which according to "He's Just Not that into You," is not a good sign (?)

He told me he will call me later and I know he will, but I am having a hard time reading him. Any thoughts?

Thanks,

GB

Gal Blondie

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Wed, 03-21-2007 - 8:49am

Yep. I agree. He is TOTALLY stringing you along.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-27-2004
Wed, 03-21-2007 - 12:29pm
I see your point and am beginning to believe the hjntiy theory more and more. I have always believed most things are gray in life which they are for the most part, but when a man is really into you then you won't question his intentions. I agree with that. If a man is not certain how into you he is and he's on the fence, then you will be questioning his intentions. But like you said overanalyzing things doesn't really help and just begins to drive us women crazy. But we still are wired that way and can't help it most of the time. It's our way of working things through in our minds and trying to come to a conclusion.
I actually don't blame men for looking at other women, because it is the way you guys are wired but I do blame them if they dont' at least try to conceal it a little around their significant others ;-)
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-21-2005
Wed, 03-21-2007 - 1:56pm
I know that you don't want to call him but at this point he keeps saying he is going to call and then doesn't... why don't you just call him and ask him what is going on. Pin him down and make him answer you. I would hate to feel so powerless all the time believing what he says and waiting for him to call. I say take matters into your own hands... That way if there is any chance... any excuse that could be true he will say it... otherwise you know and can stop thinking about it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2005
Wed, 03-21-2007 - 4:21pm

Pinning a person down won't do anything though. If a person isn't honest, will they be honest when backed against a wall? Doubtful. Sometimes it's better to just walk away and learn from an experience, don't you think?


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2006
Thu, 03-22-2007 - 6:50am

"I know that you don't want to call him but at this point he keeps saying he is going to call and then doesn't... why don't you just call him and ask him what is going on. Pin him down and make him answer you."
__________________

Why bother?

Look, the guy is clearly demonstrating what he thinks and how he feels. He isn't bothering to actually CALL HER. That, right there, tells you everything you need to know.

She should just move on. Why pin him down? What good does that do? Nothing. HJNTIher- she should move on.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-10-2004
Thu, 03-22-2007 - 10:54am

I agree. I have been in the OPs shoes where things *seemed* so good when we were together, but then the dude would drop the ball, or not call, or wait too long to call or just not be clear in some way or another.

I've been dating a guy for the past month or so who has driven it home how a man behaves when he IS into you - it makes me shake my head and wonder why I bothered with the other one when he was clearly just not that into me - no matter what he *said* his actions screamed otherwise - actions always speak louder than words! Whatever happens with this one, I'll take it as a lesson in how a man behaves when they are into you - and if they aren't really into you - why bother?

Coolas

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-21-2005
Fri, 03-23-2007 - 3:07pm
I don't know for me it would give me answers and reflief to not worry anymore. If you pin them down to give you an answer and they lie then you will either know that they are lying or give them one more chance to prove themselves... either way you have your answer. IMO
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2005
Fri, 03-23-2007 - 5:54pm

If after 2 or 3 dates, the OP has to go through this much trouble to verify that he still is interested, then I think there's a problem. If he was interested, I don't think there'd be a question about it. My response would be different if they had been together for months. But it's only the first few dates.


At the end of the day, we're all adults. As an adult, you go after what you want. You don't say one thing and act out on another, ya know? He has proven himself to be unreliable and evasive. One thing about people is that if they want something, they will go after it.


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