date planned how long do you wait 4 call

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-18-2004
date planned how long do you wait 4 call
19
Sat, 05-21-2005 - 7:34pm


ok went out last night w/ a group of friends. for happy hour the man came along to as he is part of this "group".. we did not get much time to spend together but when speaking on the phone earlier in the week he said we would plan something afterwards for "alone time".. cool..

we had a great time last night I was not able to focus my entire attention on him until later in the evening. I thought we had a great evening everyone had fun.. He mentioned to me about getting together this week and I said my mom was coming in to town.. so he then asked for a get together tonite later for a drink or something, I said that would be fine..

when he left me at the end of the evening, he said I will call you..

ok- i was am very confident that everything was going well and he was going to /meant calling me today?? and I thought he specifically asked me to go out tonite??

Well it's 4:30 here and I have not heard a thing?

what would you all do ? call it off at a certain point? if he doesn't call by 5 or 6 ?

The only reason I am thinking about it as I want to do something else if this is not on?? and it's starting to concern me now that he has not called..

but I don't want to pick up the phone either since he said he would call?

this is why i hate the beginning stages of dating.. again he seemed very sincere ..

what to do.. ??

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-16-2004
Sat, 05-21-2005 - 7:41pm
Don't make yourself available for last minute impromptu dates. An interested guy will call far enough in advance.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-18-2004
Sat, 05-21-2005 - 7:57pm

I agree Lg
however he asked me last night when I saw him and i said sure as I have been out w/ him before..

so we had plans so i thought but no calls?? so are you saying if he has not called by this time not to be availalbe now? and what do I say w/out coming across upset or negative?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-16-2004
Sat, 05-21-2005 - 8:07pm
You play it like you don't even remember the conversation.
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 05-21-2005 - 10:24pm

I'd make other plans if you haven't heard from him by now. Then if he does call, let him know that since you didn't hear from him, you made other plans so could the two of you reschedule.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-18-2004
Sat, 05-21-2005 - 10:29pm

well thanks, he never called and not really sure what happened.. like i said my instinct said he was a man of his word.. but don't get it. i figured he would have called regardless even if there was no date just to say hi..

not sure how I will handle it, if I will let it blow off or not.... wondering if should blow it off and not say anything if he does call again. I know I will run into him since we go to the same events and I don't want it to be awkard. I don't take anything personal as long as someone can be upfront and mature about things.

oh well. again, now disappointed as i thougth we had a date and i sit here recreating my evening plans.

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 05-21-2005 - 10:34pm

There's no way I could not say anything if he were to call...people not doing what they say they are going to is too big of an issue for me to let it slide. I think it shows a total lack of respect for you, and I'd call him on it. Not in a mean, obnoxious way, but in a way that lets him know that what he did wasn't at all cool. And I'd only consider going out with him again if he apologized *profusely* and had a really good excuse.

Hope you figure out something fun to do tonight! I just got a manicure/pedicure and am settling in with "Alfie" on DVD...woohoo, how's that for an exciting Sat night ;-)!

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-18-2004
Sat, 05-21-2005 - 10:36pm
yeah a movie is looking pretty good right now!! thanks NW leaving to get my DVD
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-18-2004
Sun, 05-22-2005 - 11:41am

Ok so get the call at 8:45 calls my cell then home. AT this point i have already made plans and really did not feel like hearing the "excuses"..

so get a vm barely could hear him, he mentions about us going for a drink tonite and that he fell asleep and just woke up a /1/2 hour ago. sounded as if he was in his car.

at this point i am turned off and not really interested..

I don't want to be to hard on the guy but come on, I did not ask him out, he seemed sincerely interested in me and then doesn't call until the end of the day?? Some said I could have called earlier to see what was going on, but our first "real date" together I did not think that was appropriate.. We did go out several times before but not "alone"..

so... how many hall passes do you give? Honesty i really don't have much desire to go out w/ him as I feel it's now become work and not fun.. I don't need to start off this way w/someone just to have a date..

again he asked me out all I did was show interest..

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 05-22-2005 - 11:56am

Oh, yeah, 8:45 is WAY too late to call! I swear, if I had a dollar for every time I've heard the "I fell asleep" excuse, I'd be a rich woman! I don't really buy that, because I've personally never "fallen asleep" when I don't intend to, but I suppose it could happen! Did he apologize? That would be the key point for me.

If he did apologize, I'd give him another shot (but just one).

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2005
Sun, 05-22-2005 - 12:00pm

Hey, hope you had fun doing whatever you did last night.

 
 

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