Date Yesterday..
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| Mon, 10-23-2006 - 11:47am |
well I had the date with the guy who i'm his first online date. Of course I really have no clue what will happen next. I was happy with his appearance AND personality, which is RARE with online dating for me. So that was cool. We had some food, a drink, talked. He seemed very talkative over email, but not as much in person. i expected him to be sort of loud and out goign in person since his emails to me were so long and he wrote me everyday from when he first contacted me. He mentioned again that he has only been doing online dating a week, has not gone public with his profile basically because he's afraid of people he knows seeing him on there. So he was the one to end the date basically after about an hour and a half. Is that a big deal? I mean i know it's sunday night, people have things to do, i certainly didnt expect to be out all night. He asked what i was doing tonight (last night), i said nothing really, what are you doing? he said he was going to watch football at 8:30 or so. So i feel sort of like i got blown off for football? Should i have expected him to stay out later with me? So when we left he hugged me, and said he would be in touch over email or the phone. He did comment during the date that i looked good in my pics, even better in person. i figure he didnt have to say this...i dunno...i would have thought he'd have sent an email today...but he didnt.

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An hour and a half seems long to me for a first meet, so I wouldn't think anything of it, nor would I expect someone to change their plans for me on a first meet.
I always find it best to assume that I'm not going to hear from a guy again early on. That way if he does call, it's a nice surprise, but if he doesn't, I've already started the moving on process.
I also find that it helps to email other guys right after a date so you're not feeling like it's all or nothing with a particular guy.
Sheri
yeah, you're right. I think this may have been my shortest first date though, so that's why i was a little confused. I didnt mind, wasnt like i was dying to stay out and chat. But i thought maybe he ended it early beause he wasnt interested
I do have another date tomorrow, so we'll see. I'm still talking to other guys. I almost feel like i'm at the end of my rope. When i do searches the same people come up...yet when i get contacted it's by people i've never seen online...i'm like, where are these people coming from? lol...my subscription ends next week...i dont think i will renew. If anything comes about with these people, great, if not i think i'll take a break from paying for a sub. I will keep a profile up so does that mean people can still write to me? I"m on yahoo.
Hmm, interesting. It could be that their profiles are unsearchable.
So far as I know, you should still be able to get emails on Yahoo even if you're not a subscriber, you just can't reply to them. I don't think they have gone as far as match (where you can't even read your emails), at least not yet.
Sheri
Don't jump to conclusions. It's only been one date, and it's healthy for both of you to continue to see other people at first. Just because he logged on and changed his photo does not necessarily mean he doesn't like you. :)
I do agree with Sheri, though, that it's good to e-mail other guys right now so you don't get too wrapped up in just one.
Eventually, a guy you really like and find attractive will feel the same way about you. After all, that's why we're all out there trying again and again, aren't we? Eventually, someone sticks.
AJ, enjoying life with C.
thanks...
at this point i dont what is proper for me to do. Do I sit and wait for him to contact me or should i send him a note thanking him? He did after all pay...but i dont know. I dont want to seem overly eager.
I always struggle with that as well. The advice others here have given me is to wait - as long as you thanked him right after the date, that's sufficient. I have noticed that the guys who are truly interested will contact you again whether you send a thank you e-mail or not.
I know - waiting's the hardest part - but I think it's best to show you have a life and are not waiting by the phone.
AJ, enjoying life with C.
Actually, this is probably much more about him being a newbie to OLD and wanting to experience the smorgasbord he thinks is in store for him than it is about you.
And no, IMO, it's not that you're not "good enough", you're just not right for those guys for some reason. "Not right" doesn't mean there's anything wrong with either of you, you're just not right for each other. I know it can feel like you're not good enough, but if you can master not taking dating personally, it will help a TON.
Sheri
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