Dating story(girls lie about height too)
Find a Conversation
| Sun, 06-05-2005 - 3:24pm |
I wanted to share a story about a date I had last night. It was from OLD, and it was the fastest date I have ever had between start of communication and actual meeting.
I had an email in my Match inbox Friday night from a girl here in town. I sent a wink back immediately (I am not a paying member) and she must have gotten the hint, so she responded with her regular email address in the next message. We wrote several back and forth and I asked her out for last night. She said ok, and I was proud of myself for not letting the communication go on forever.
So we meet at a nice Italian restaurant. (I know, supposed to keep it short on a first date, but I am bad about that). Anyway, it was actually a really good first date as far as chemistry. The conversation was easy and we did have a lot of common interests. After eating, we sat and talked for another hour before finally getting up to leave. Physically, I found her very attractive. She has really beautiful eyes.
So what's the problem, you ask? Well, I was a little distressed to find out that she lied about her height, and not in the direction you're probably thinking. She was *taller* than me by a little bit, and I'm 6'4". She has to be at least 6'5". Her profile says she's 6'0". (She wasn't wearing heels, BTW).
Now, I don't have a problem with her being taller. I'm certainly not used to the girl being taller than me, but it really didn't bother me. I guess I'm just worried that it's going to bother *her*. I just know in general women like the man to be taller than themselves. However, she had to know she was going to be taller before the date, unless I had made myself *shorter* on my profile.
I called her today and told her that I had a good time last night, and she said the same. We have a date planned tentatively for the middle of this coming week. So, I'm excited to have a prospect, at least. :-)
Eric

Pages
I suppose that's possible, although I've only seen this work in reverse (i.e., that you think someone is the same height or shorter than you standing face to face, but it turns out they are really taller than you when you stand back to back). But maybe if I were 6'4", I'd have the opposite problem ;-).
Sheri
I like what Vexer said in her post -- that is very much what I'm feeling. It's true -- in this area I feel good even if I can get to an actual face-to-face meeting, so to have a nice one on top of that is promising.
It could very well be that she lied about other things too. However, I think extreme height for a woman is similar to a guy being short. Girls are afraid that guys always prefer a short, petite woman, the same way guys think women always want a tall, strapping man. So if she did do it knowingly, it was probably done with good intentions. Anyway, I've made up my mind I am going to ask her about it.
It's true, I can't say exactly how tall she is, but I do have pretty good judgement about height. At 6'4" I'm the *shortest* in my family except for my mom, who is over 6' herself.
We have a date planned for this weekend, so I am excited and I hope it goes well. :-)
Eric
I'm still not really understanding how a lie (other than a white lie to spare someone *else's* feelings) can be done with "good intentions". I totally get that she might be afraid men wouldn't want to date her because of her height, and that has got to make dating tough for her, but that still doesn't justify lying, any more than I would be justified lying about my age because so many men (even in my age group) don't want to date women over 45. It's not fair and I hate it, but I'm not going to LIE, ya know?
But, in any event, I'm glad you've decided to ask her about it, and I hope this just turns out to be a small aberration in her otherwise sterling character ;-)!
Sheri
Hey, have a great time this weekend, eric!!!
amjay
at least his eyes are open about it.. i personally don't see a big deal about it. she probably either doesn't really know her height or it bothers her so she did not put the real height as to scare people away. i think this is different than lieing about your age or a man saying he is 6 foot and is really only 5 '5.. but that's my opinion.. i don't think it's that big of a red flag but at least he can ask her about it.
and have a great time Eric :)
Eric-
I have to agree with Sheri. If someone will ie about one thing, then why give them the chance to lie about other things? I am only 4'11", and as MUCH as I would like to make that sound better, I would rather be honest. If that rules out most men (which apparently it does), then at least I know I am being honest. If it doesn't bother you, then that's YOUR business. I just know it would bother me and I would see that as a prelude to more dishonesty. Good luck whatever you decide.
Pages