Did I overreact?
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| Mon, 01-23-2006 - 2:35pm |
I had a date this weekend with a man I had dated a couple of years ago (two dates then). I called it off back then because I went back with my BF. Recently the same guy answered a blind ad I had on CL. I told him it was me, and we decided to go out again and see what happens. We had an okay time, he kissed me goodnight (not very well). Then I get this email from him today:
"Trust you made it back home ok. Your directions were good ... although I was quite distracted from driving with the feel of your lips and holding you very much on my mind!
I was wondering if we could have each other for lunch some afternoon this week at your place or mine.. :-) ... "
I wrote back to him saying that he must have misunderstood me, and I am not interested in casual sex with him or anyone and that's what it would be at this point because we really don't know each other.
What do you all think? Did I misinterpret, or was I on the money?

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Wow! Still that guy had SUCH nerve! Hi, I expect you to be on MY PAGE (which is sexually focused) off the bat. What a JERK!
Trust takes time- and so does getting to know someone. So therefore, he wants to check out how the sex is BEFORE he makes any sort of emotional commitment (or have any expectation from you)- yeah, that sound great- if you were a doormat!
What a jerk! His comments show his lack of ability to commit to someone emotionally- but hey- he wants the sex upfront!
I tell guys after the first few dates (if its going somewhere)- that I am only interested in having sex if I am in a commited relationship. This of course, does not mean I am asking for that now, but I wanted to make it clear of what I am looking for. Then, if the guy continues to try to pressure for sex- its an easy decision- he's a jerk and doesn't respect me.
You made the right decision- this guy wants nothing more than his cake.
>> "...enjoying each other's company socially and sexually, and growing emotionally thru that experience, with no pressure from either side"<<
That says FWB to me. Can ytou really grow emotionally through a FWB relationship?
No pressure? To me, that means he wants no responsibility but he'd love to have sex and show you off at parties occasionally.
I think you dodged a bullet on this one.
AJ, enjoying life with C.
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