Don't know what to think...

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-02-2005
Don't know what to think...
3
Mon, 12-12-2005 - 3:42pm
My best friend recently started online dating (thanks to me :) ). She has found some really nice guys. There's this new guy that she started emailing. Somehow, I'm not sure how she did this, she sort of background searched him. She's found some charges he has: burglary multiple times, possession. They are from prolly 5 years or more ago I think she said. And hes only in his early 20's. She came to me asking for advice on this and I don't know what to tell her. She says he's really nice and they seem to have a lot in common. She doesn't know how to bring up the situation of the charges either. I want to help her but I don't know what to tell her. Maybe he's changed? I dont know. Anyone know what to do about this? Should jailtime affect getting to know someone? It's not like it's murder right? Please help!!! Thanks!
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-27-2005
Mon, 12-12-2005 - 3:50pm

I think everyone has a different opinion about this subject.

For me, I don't think I could ever be with someone who did something immoral and illegal, even if they swear they have changed. That speaks volumes to me about what kind of person they are. So I doubt I would date someone with a record.
As for your friend, I think you should be honest about how YOU feel about the situation but remind her that its just an opinion and she needs to make up her own mind about what to do.

We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Mon, 12-12-2005 - 4:03pm

I would ask him if he's ever been in trouble.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2005
Mon, 12-12-2005 - 4:52pm
That's a really level headed response.