Dreammates

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-05-2003
Dreammates
1
Wed, 11-16-2005 - 7:10pm

I've been meaning to post something about this for a while.

Have any of you been happy with Dreammates?

I posted an ad there about the same time I had joined eharmony (which was a complete waste, by the way) and was freaked out by the behavior of the men who have also posted ads.

When you're online viewing the site, other members can instant message you, which happened to me twice.

The first guy was from California (I live in Ohio), so I wondered why the heck he wanted to talk to me, but I quickly found out why. We weren't chatting five minutes before he started saying he wanted to come visit me and (I was waiting for the first sign of this) then began saying disgusting things about how he, suffice it to say, would "pleasure
me." I immediately locked him out, which meant he wasn't able to chat with me or send messages to my mailbox.

The next evening, I went in to delete my profile and another member messaged me. He asked me three times "Are you lonely?" and after talking for less than five minutes, wanted me to call him and was saying things like "You and I are meant to be together."

He wouldn't tell me a thing about him, like what he did for a living or what his interests were. When I asked about his family, he said his parents had been killed by a drunk driver and he was an only child. (I'm really sorry if that's true, but I doubt that it is.)

And are these guys for real when they think I'll call them (I'm sure they have caller ID) or that I will give out my phone number to someone I don't know? I didn't just fall off the turnip truck yesterday for crying out loud.

I'm happy for all of you who have had success meeting someone online, but I don't feel safe doing it anymore.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2003
In reply to: amytct
Wed, 11-16-2005 - 8:03pm
Some of the sites give the ability to hide whether you are online or not, or turn off IM. I'd suggest you use that feature if it is available to you, otherwise every pervert or freakzoid will try to get a rise out of you through IM.