Empty Profiles ???
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| Tue, 01-31-2006 - 3:06pm |
What do you think of online profiles that are either empty or don't give much information besides, user name, age, location and education? What if they have no picture or only one, not so great one?
I have a friend that had been doing online dating for some time and she does not get many dates. She often asks me to help her with her profile (writing info etc). The problem I have with that is I feel that your profile should reflect who you are, in her words and that she should do it herself. But since she does not know what she wants, what she's looking for, what she is interested in, what she's passionate about or what she wants in life (besides babies), her profiles remain blank and boring.
I feel that this reflects exactly who she is and that is why she has had such limited prospects. I do not want to jazz things up for her because I feel that it may falsely advertise her and I'd hate to meet a guy with a cool profile and find that he has no interests/personality and someone else did it for him.
Basically, I want her to find things worthwhile about herself to say and then I'll help her express it but I will not create an online personality for her. I wanna help her but she gives me no material to work with.
What do you think of this situation and empty profiles that I have described.

I ignore men who have empty profiles. Either they're only looking for sex, married, or are very, very boring people. Course, I've seen a ton of guys on Lavalife who don't even fill in race, religion, education, etc. Let me tell them something - if their race/religion/education/whatever is going to turn someone off right off the bat, those people aren't going to change their minds when they meet the guy. Just save time!
I'm in the minority on pictures. If a guy doesn't have one in his profile, I'll ask for one. Doesn't bother me.
"...if their race/religion/education/whatever is going to turn someone off right off the bat, those people aren't going to change their minds when they meet the guy."
I totally agree!!!
I tend to ignore the "empty" profiles.
Maybe it's just hard for her to talk about herself, I know it is for me to try and sound unique. My friend wrote my profile and it's not at all "jazzy" just straight forward and direct about who I am. Describes me accurately and I don't feel weird writing it. LOL
Why not help your friend if she's asking for your help isn't that what friends are for?
Funny, I just had a guy send me a message on Lavalife - his ethnic background and religion are blank. When I asked (I mean, MY profile has everything, including a picture), he called me shallow and signed off. lol
Too bad, he might have been my match...
I would like to help her out but I feel that she gives me nothing to work with.
If I ask her what are her interests, she doesn't know. If I ask if her goals, desires, dreams, again she really doesn't know. I feel like I can't help her unless she knows how to answer questions about herself. And basically, I think she needs to give this more thought before trying to get with anyone.
"Maybe she has no goals desires or dreams maybe she's just happy with her life the way it is and doesn't want to "improve" it or reach for something else, I can't imagine not knowing what she's interested in, are you two close friends, because most of my close friends know what I like to do on any given day...maybe she's not all that interested in dating."
Actually to get a better idea of her interests, I asked her what her passions were and her response was she wants to have a family and raise kids. Outside of that, she has no other interests. She's not really happy with her life at the moment. I think she is mildly depressed.
We are close but I've been struggling with this for awhile, because she just doesn't seem to be interested in anything. She doesn't actually do anything but work and come home and lay around. Personally, I think she needs to work more on herself before she can enter dating. RIght now, I cannot see what she has to offer any guy.
Have you tried talking to her about her depression? I know it's hard to do something like that, but yes, it sounds like she is not in a good place to date right now. She may be depressed BECAUSE she doesn't have anyone, but if she goes out in this state, she's not going to give off good vibes and will either push everyone away or will attract someone that's not good for her.
As for the profile thing, yeah, that's definitely why she is not getting a good response. I will ignore profiles that don't have much info. That's the problem I am finding with Craigs List. You usually don't get much info on them until you've exchanged an email or two and even then, sometimes you don't get much.