EX-CON is his title

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
EX-CON is his title
6
Thu, 10-20-2005 - 12:30pm

Here is the body of his profile:

Hey! just got out of prison ladies and lookin to score "BIG TIME!" I have no sense of humor and I am short, fat,bald,and really ugly. My personality sucks and I have an unidentifiable odor about me. My dinner conversations are less than desirable and you better wear a nose plug (afore mentioned odor) and my cooking sucks. I think the lunch meat is old,but the pickles are good though they are well preserved. I do not like anything romantic, I hate travel, candlelit dinners, holding hands, cuddling, and kissing, yuck. I especially abhor sex!!!! My kids are not a problem,all ten of them are in juvie hall not expected out anytime soon. Their mothers are still trying to collect child support,but all the drugs I've done really messes up the genetic testing.(lucky for me) I have lots of great relatives, as a matter of fact there is this little town in the middle of nowhere and we are all related. Cool huh? I have no $ either hope social security is not a problem???
Well as far as my ideal match? Must bathe once a month whether they need it or not. Teeth are optional, and lots of hair is desirable especially if it protrudes from the ears and nose. There was this Doctor in the psych ward and she had a mustache, got me real hot! Please send a picture so I can make sure you are not related to me,come to find out my last girlfriend was my cousin and that did not work out very well.Dating may get complicated because I'm still on house arrest,and all my outside time must be spent with my parole officer.Hey! maybe we could double date if you have any friends,and if it doesn't work out between us, I could ask her out to boot!Thanks sexy ladies!

I'm sorry for never posting anymore because I am happily involved with the man on met OLD almost 9 months ago... but I am always lurking and constantly rooting you guys on!

Anyways... this guy actually showed a picture (3) and he's not "my type" but an OK looking human being... and BTW, I was lurking to see if my STBX has a profile... Girls told me that he wants to find a girlfriend and doesn't know how... and I know that his brother who he lives with OLD's...

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2004
Thu, 10-20-2005 - 1:13pm
This guy is just trying to be funny...
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-2005
Thu, 10-20-2005 - 1:32pm
That totally cracks me up! (I could do without the reference to the lunch meat and pickles.) I must have a sick sense of humor because I would respond to him in a minute!
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Thu, 10-20-2005 - 1:40pm
ROFLOL

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-19-2004
Thu, 10-20-2005 - 2:00pm
Sounds like he's being funny and trying to put out the worst profile ever and see if people bite!
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2004
Thu, 10-20-2005 - 9:32pm
I think that is pretty funny!
Linda
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 10-21-2005 - 10:29am
I obviously also knew he was just joking... but imagine taking the chance responding to someone who you know nothing about other than their humor. I wonder if I can link to him so you can see it... does that work?



Edited 10/21/2005 10:38 am ET by tupperkerr