Feeling artificial

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-01-2005
Feeling artificial
4
Thu, 04-06-2006 - 9:11pm

I guess I'm kind of second guessing the whole OLD thing. It feels so fake, so artificial.

I met this guy from CL last week, and while he seems very nice, I guess I'm a little weirded out by the fact that I met a guy with the intent of deciding whether or not to date him. I know that's the idea, but it seems strange.

The problem is that I think I could like this guy a lot, but need to grow into the idea. I don't think I can just go on dates with him, I need to be friends first and then fall for that friend. I know I can't tell him I just want to be friends (believe me, I know what happens when you do that!).

What do I do...







Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 04-06-2006 - 9:21pm

Ah...if that's the case for you, then you may be right...OLD may not be for you. I'm just the opposite...I can't feel romantic feelings for a guy who treats me like a friend. I personally *like* the fact that you meet people from OLD with the intention of deciding whether or not to date them.

You might do better with meeting people through activities, etc. so you can get to know them as friends first.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-01-2005
Thu, 04-06-2006 - 9:27pm

Ok, but what do I do in THIS case? :-)

I can see myself falling for this guy, but don't want to do it on a forced timeline.







Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 04-06-2006 - 9:29pm

Hmm...I'm curious, what do you see as a "forced timeline"? Why can't you just date him and see what happens? You don't have to do anything you don't feel comfortable with sooner than you feel comfortable with it. Just be upfront with him about wanting to take things slowly.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-01-2005
Thu, 04-06-2006 - 9:40pm

I think it's because he's very interested. The only thing that's kept me from running already is that he's out of town most of the time (pilot) and our schedules don't mesh.

I haven't been chased in a few years, and it feels strange. Almost like, "What does this guy see in me, he's only met me once."

I don't even know if thatmakes sense.

Anyway, he just emailed me and mentioned my friend's upcoming wedding. ONLY - I've told him a few times that it's my BROTHER. Argh. I hate when people don't listen- but he attached a picture of his completed 66 Mustang. I'm in love.

Dating sucks.