found a great guy...in love....

First off I think it's great you've found love but wow! What a bind. How old are you? You said you were in law school? Hmmm, that seems like a huge thing to give up. How long have you been talking to your new honey? You don't say, although if you broke up with Mr.Ex in June I'm going to assume two or three months? It is a lot to give up for a guy you hardly know. It's a lot to give up for a guy you've known for a long time! He's also divorced and has three kids...not a bad thing but if you're single and have never had any children then it could come as sort of a shock to be tossed into an instant family like that. It also doesn't help that your mom doesn't like him...although you're a grown woman and it really shouldn't matter what anyone thinks sometimes choosing between the man you love and family can be a rough ride, especially if your from a close knit one. Been there done that. Does he know your mum doesn't like him? It would also be a good idea to meet him face to face before you make the big leap. And see him as often as you can before you make the decision to move in with him. He might be Mr.Sweetness now but what is he going to be like a month down the road? Also the kids could be a problem. Don't get me wrong...I love kids as much as the next maybe even more...but at the same time if they move in around the same time you do, it could be a huge adjustment because not only are you trying to establish a relationship with him (I don't know about you but I'd probably like some quality time with my sweetie. Some ALONE time;) Not gonna happen with Jr around )...you're going to have to establish a working one with his kids too and you may not always be top priorty. Not saying you expect to be top priorty but are you ready to be a step mom to his children? Because if you're living with him and the kids are living with both of you that's essentially what you'll be. To get up at two am because some one had a bad dream and can only get back to sleep if he can wiggle between you two for the night? To be walked in on in a private moment? Are you willing to share him with them and his ex wife because she'll be in the picture too. They have children together which means she will be in your lives until the kids are eighteen or older and no matter what you think of her you'll have to try and deal with her because she's the mother of these children and there's nothing worse than watching grown ups fight when your a kid. It's not only you're life that's gonna change but these kids lives too. They're gonna have to adjust not only to a new home and school but dad's new friend too. Which could be tough on both of you. Are you ready to balance school and work while trying to help him raise his kids and deal with whatever problems he may have with his ex wife? I'd say that you're sacrificing WAY more than he is. Emotionally and career wise. Especially if your heart is set on getting your law degree and becoming a lawyer. You love the guy...I can understand that...we all can. But are you willing to give it all up for a man you haven't even met yet? I'd say take your time. I know it's a hard thing to do because you're crazy in love with the man and want to be with him and visa versa...but what do you really know about his situation...what's his ex wife like? How are his kids? How old are they (if they're just wee ones then it might not be so bad but anything over ten you could be asking for trouble). I'm not saying to give up on it...but look before you leap...and look REALLY hard. I personally think he's asking a little too much in such short a time span. Then when you've met him and thought about everything involved you can make up you're mind then:) Make sure you meet his children too...ask if there's a possiblity for that because they're gonna be your new roomies too:). Well best of luck...sorry it sounds like I was preaching but guys with kids can be tricky...especially if the kids are with them. You have to sort of prepare yourself to share him. You're not only making sacrifies for him but for these kids too. Ok, now that I've said my two cents, I will step off my soap box and brace myself for anything I may have said that offends people. But good luck to you and I hope everything works out.

M.