Gee, Was I too Direct??? Good Riddance!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2005
Gee, Was I too Direct??? Good Riddance!
40
Wed, 09-21-2005 - 3:01pm

Here's my story:

I was chatting with a guy I met online and then we exchanged numbers (and I gave my home #) and decided to meet. Well the day of the "meet" I was running late w/errands and I did not have his phone number with me -- left it at home. Anyway I got home late and called to apologize. He didn't seem very receptive but we continued talking. During this same conversation, I offered to give him my cell # to which he declined -- stating I have your home and that's sufficient. Whatever!! Well last night I get home after 8:45 pm and this guy leaves a message on my phone at 4:30 pm asking that we meet at the mall.

I didn't call him back and sent this email today:

Sorry I was unable to meet you yesterday at the Mall, but did not receive your message until I arrived home from work. You were reluctant in taking my work # and/or cell # and nor do I want to force the issue, but in the future if you are trying to connect or would like to meet, I don't have a problem with being spontaneous, but you would need to be a bit more flexible (and open) in taking a number from me to assure a contact. In retrospect, calling me at home at 5:00 pm (when I leave work after 5:30 pm) is moot.

Also, as stated in a previous conversation, the best time to reach me in the evening (at HOME) would be after 7:30 pm.

On another note, how is your day going?

****************
His response:

What??? anyway moot point or not you had my home number and failed notify me that you could not meet so allow me to put in perspective don't bother now I would prefer to discontinue further communications with you you could have called to say you could not make but you di not. Now since you're being a but about it your excuse did nor cut it with so don't bother.

**************
My response:

Wise decision. Good luck to you!




Edited 9/22/2005 9:12 am ET ET by tstephnic
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-03-2004
Wed, 09-21-2005 - 9:12pm
In your shoes, I would have sent her a private message. It would have been a kinder way of dealing with it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Wed, 09-21-2005 - 9:21pm

Tstephnic:

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Wed, 09-21-2005 - 9:32pm

I'll be the first to admit I'm not perfect.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2005
Wed, 09-21-2005 - 9:40pm

It's interesting to me... if a man "stood us up" we'd be irrate... but why do we make excuses for ourselves? LOL


I do it alllllllllllllllll the time!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-03-2004
Wed, 09-21-2005 - 9:42pm

Jennie, I don't think bad of you. I believe you wanted to be helpful. I just pointed out to you that some *helpfulness* is not appreciated by the general population, despite your good intentions.

:)

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2005
Wed, 09-21-2005 - 9:43pm

I'll renig my post since it seems all is well... ;o)


iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Wed, 09-21-2005 - 9:49pm

Unfortunately, my good intentions are bound to be misunderstood or unappreciated again and again and again in the future.

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Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 09-21-2005 - 9:52pm

FWIW, I didn't think you were rude in the least, and I *hope* Steph didn't think so! So long as it's done kindly (and i think it was), I would MUCH prefer having someone tell me I was using a word incorrectly, rather than letting me go on using it! To me, not doing so would be like not telling someone they had spinach in their teeth.

Sheri

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 09-21-2005 - 9:58pm

As someone who tends to do this (correct grammar), I'll try to remember not to correct *yours*, AM!!! But if I ever do, please know that it is well-intentioned and not meant to be rude...it's me doing what I would want someone to do for me.

But even when one follows the golden rule (do unto others as you would have them do unto you), it can still gets you in trouble, LOL!

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-14-2005
Wed, 09-21-2005 - 10:10pm
Posting the definition and correct useage from the dictionary isn't rude? Talk about making someone feel inadequate. And again, it so doesn't matter. Another natural disaster is about to fall upon us. Who cares about mute, moot, or moo?