Ghosts Galore!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Ghosts Galore!
11
Tue, 03-08-2005 - 6:02pm

Well, I am just chock full of ghosts this week!

1) The guy that I had talked to about meeting has slowly drifted off. He works out of town most weekends (according to him) and called last Friday to see if we could set something up for this week. I called him back Sunday when he said he'd be back in town. I've heard nothing since.

2) The guy I mentioned from eH that had no picture. I sent a nice initial email asking about him and stuff and also asking for a picture saying it was only fair since he knew what I looked like (in a teasing manner). That was Saturday. Nada

3) A guy from eH that we had just reached open communication. On his profile his name was one thing and in his email he wrote another. I mentioned the change in name. I gave him my real email address b/c I don't like going on the site to email. That was Thursday. Zippo

4) Another guy from eH that had gotten to open communication. He went to a rival school of my college and I mentioned it in a joking manner. I answered a slew of questions from him and gave him my email address. That was Sunday. HELLLOOOOO! Echo! - Echo!

Two others haven't even got off the ground - they requested communication so I responded and I haven't heard back. The only two that seem to keep it up are 2 that I am really not interested in at all and the guy on Yahoo that keeps calling me "Cutie". I think I might just ghost on him. No enthusiasm to continue that one. Sigh, the saga continues.

131.gif image by y_baros th5K.gif image by jade_simo

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-07-2005
In reply to: vexer_hw
Tue, 03-08-2005 - 6:10pm

Hang in there Vexer! Some guys are just SSSSLLLLLOOOOWWWWW!!!!! I think we as women are quicker to get things taken care of with OLD and we prioritize our lives, so their lengthy times between communication always seem like ghosting... but may not actually be that... maybe you'll hear from some of them soon. But in the mean time, any new ones to start the process with?!

Sunshine

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
In reply to: vexer_hw
Tue, 03-08-2005 - 6:22pm

Not really. I got a couple of winks and an email on Match this week. None of them are interesting enough for me pay a membership fee to respond and they did not include a real email or if they did, the system stripped it out. One guy on Matchmaker sent me an email last night and we've just started communicating. He seems OK.

Guy #1 is notoriously slow at getting back and we've only been talking a couple weeks so we'll see if we can ever get on the phone at the same time to set up the meeting but I am not counting on it.

I guess with the other ones, I think they are ghosts b/c it was almost a daily correspondence until this last email. Now it has been days with no communication. Not usually a good sign.

131.gif image by y_baros th5K.gif image by jade_simo

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-16-2004
In reply to: vexer_hw
Tue, 03-08-2005 - 6:24pm
This sounds pretty normal for online.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-07-2005
In reply to: vexer_hw
Tue, 03-08-2005 - 6:35pm

Well if that's the case - then I say you were probably too good for them anyway! Their loss!!!! How do you like Matchmaker?

Sunshine

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-22-2003
In reply to: vexer_hw
Tue, 03-08-2005 - 7:16pm

I know what you mean; ghosting is a big problem for me and one of my friends who also uses on-line dating. If I am not interested in someone or I wish to terminate communication I say so (in a nice, polite way of course); I find it rude when people just disappear like that (esp. after you have gone out once or twice). I find now I can usually see it coming; when I first started the on-line thing in 2004 I took it pretty personally when they did it; I have since learned not to and try not to let it get to me anymore; hey, its their loss.

mom of 2

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-26-2004
In reply to: vexer_hw
Tue, 03-08-2005 - 8:44pm

HI Vex,

I think I am gonna name this house the Haunted Mansion--soooo many ghosts!

Know what you mean; I can start out ona Sunday with 5 or 6 good prospects, and slowly, like an OLD plague, the drop off the face of my Planet. ("Doctor, he has a weak Heart..what is your prognosis?!")

But...good Gnus! They come back! I think they are shotgunning, or they have a date for the coming weekend already, just casting more lines. Then, when that date does not go as they want to/where they want to, then they roll back up. I have a date tommorrow night, and 3 more that seem to be in the "microwave" (or warming!) stage...as always, I take it with the grain of salt,on that Industrial Sized margarita, please! :)

Hang with it, things will sprout soon!

truly,
Cupcake

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
In reply to: vexer_hw
Tue, 03-08-2005 - 10:03pm

Matchmaker is awful. At first it seemed OK but most of the men ghosted, were freaks that wouldn't leave me alone after I asked them politely to do so or asked for sex. I have already cancelled my membership but I had paid through the end of the month.

And I am used to the ghosts, I have been doing this a long time. I am just really, really sick of them. It would be nice to have a nice meeting sometime.

131.gif image by y_baros th5K.gif image by jade_simo

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
In reply to: vexer_hw
Tue, 03-08-2005 - 10:46pm
Actually the Matchmaker guy is turning out to be kinda funny and nice. I gave him my email address. Anyone wanna take the bet that he ghosts? :-) I got another that didn't post his picture for "professional reasons" but will "provide one upon request". I chatted a bit in an email with him and asked for a picture. We'll see how that one goes.

131.gif image by y_baros th5K.gif image by jade_simo

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2004
In reply to: vexer_hw
Wed, 03-09-2005 - 10:17am
Vex, I was on matchmaker for 3 months and thought it was one of the worst sites yet (and that's sayin' something :) I was hoping you'd have better luck with it since you're younger than me. I don't know how they stay in business. I've heard it was better before Lycos bought it. I got very few responses on it, compared to match and yahoo, and the ones I got were either geezers, freaks or lived way too far away (some were all three -- we have a winner!!).
Oh, and the one normal-seeming guy emailed me back and forth for a couple weeks and ghosted when I suggested (gasp) actually meeting.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-10-2004
In reply to: vexer_hw
Wed, 03-09-2005 - 12:38pm

>>I got another that didn't post his picture for "professional reasons" but will "provide one upon request".<<

That is such a BS excuse. "Professional reasons" really means "I'm ashamed to be single and using OLD and don't want anyone to know".

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