had "the talk" with Teddy over the wkend

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2005
had "the talk" with Teddy over the wkend
23
Tue, 11-29-2005 - 3:13pm
forget it


Edited 11/30/2005 7:48 pm ET by kae_n_me
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2005
Wed, 11-30-2005 - 3:59pm

I think people wh purposely nit-pick at other people's happiness are also insecure and emotionally unstable...

sorry I posted my good news...




Edited 11/30/2005 7:49 pm ET by kae_n_me
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 11-30-2005 - 4:19pm

Did you miss the words "MAY" and "USUALLY" in my post??? They were in there for a reason. In any event, I stand by my opinion. You are free to disagree, but please do not put words in my mouth...I did not say ALL shy people are insecure, as you imply.

And what exactly about me saying that I disagree with your viewpoint on text messaging was unclear to you? Additional reasons why you think it's a good idea aren't going to change my mind. That's all well and good for you, but personally I think that if you can't be honest with someone face to face, there's really no point in being in a relationship with them.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Wed, 11-30-2005 - 4:26pm

Kae - you are jumping on Sheri unnecessarily. She has said that it is not always the case that a shy person is insecure/has low self esteem/is emotionally unhealthy. She said that commonly, they are and I completely agree. I am very shy until you get to know me and I know I have self-esteem/insecurity issues. Sure, not everyone is but I bet a lot of shy people deep down are insecure and have low self esteem or self confidence. It doesn't make me or any other person who is shy or has low self esteem a bad person. It just is.

Also, I have to agree with her on the texting thing too. A serious conversation should be had in person or at the minimum on the phone. If you were sick and tired, it could wait. If you didn't want to get caught up on the phone, fine - don't answer. And the easy out reason is a cop out (for lack of a less harsh way to say that, sorry). You're a grown up - none of us likes to have difficult conversations, but they are part of life. Texting and emailing can be SOOOOOO taken out of context because you do not have the advantage of tone and inflection of voice. I don't know how many times I have misunderstood something someone says by email - it sounds really rude, or something to me and they didn't mean it that way at all. Again, JMHO (and as Sheri said - different opinions are what make the world go round!) but I wouldn't do it that way either.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2005
Wed, 11-30-2005 - 11:07pm

Hi Kae,


I'm sorry you deleted your post... why did you?


iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2005
Thu, 12-01-2005 - 8:28am
Because I was simply sharing some good news, I was not asking for advise or opinions, yet a few people felt the need to rain on my parade, nit-pick, and pretty much infer that I am insecure and emotionally unhealthy.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2005
Fri, 12-02-2005 - 6:57am

Kae, I'm sorry you feel that way. I can't vouch for others' opinions, however based on what I read, I thought the comments were towards the guy, not you.


Suggestion? In the future (and I do hope you stick around) when you just want to share, maybe state that upfront and say something like "I'm just sharing some good news, not looking for opinions..." so people on the board know what you're looking for?


As for you and your guy, good luck! He does seem sweet and I hope he continues to treat you sweetly.


Kerry

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-14-2005
Fri, 12-02-2005 - 9:54am
It's a combination - you're on the sensitive side and others like to fluff out like a peacock sometimes....lol. Before getting all upset consider these things: (1) it's a public message board where anyone can post anything as long as it doesn't violate TOS, (2) nobody knows you so who cares what they think and (3) consider the source - not everyone behaves as they say they would in real life. Don't believe everything you read. "Emotionally healthy" is a subjective term depending on who defines it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2005
Fri, 12-02-2005 - 10:08am

Regardless of whether I'm of the sensitive nature, as you think, or not. I find it highly improper of people to judge others based on a happy course of events. I am in agreement with you that people on here like to "fluff their feathers", and I wish they would only fluff those who 1) reguest it 2) fluff their feathers at them/their posts. Neither of these apply to my post or to me. Lately, I have stayed away because I hate to post, knowing that certain posters are going to rain on my parade and insinuate things... which Sherry did insinuate that anyone who texts messages "important" conversation topics to be emotionally unhealthy... well that was a direct stab at what I had said I did. So, I did take offense to that. SOme people need to realize that being too judgmental or trying to rain on people's parade is also a trait of being emotionally unhealthy as well.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2005
Fri, 12-02-2005 - 10:10am

Kerry- if you didn't ready my very first post, then you missed what is said. And Sherri was deliberatly making a stab at me and calling me emotionally unhealthy. THe guy didn't text me, I started texting him, so she was referring to MY actions. Which I have already addressed as being rude and inpolite.

I have in the past, posted how I felt about people posting their advise or negative opinions when not specifically asked for in my posts....

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Fri, 12-02-2005 - 10:41am

I don't think Sherri was taking a stab at you, or your bf, or judging either of you.

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