Help with On-line Dating

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-11-2005
Help with On-line Dating
3
Thu, 03-23-2006 - 7:36pm

Okay...about a month ago, my friend told me to go to this site, where she met her boyfriend. The site is www.okcupid.com It is a free dating website and I check it a few times a week. I have found some interesting guys on there that do not live very far from where I am at (right now at school). This one guy, who I am interested in, is about 45 minutes away at school for his graduate/PhD studies. He is 23, which is in the age range I am looking for since I am going to be 21 in less than 3 weeks. We have been talking for about a week now and I feel so connected with this guy. He is smart, funny (always funny), considerate to me when I am having a bad day or my away message indicates that I had a bad day. We have talked for about, on average an hour a day for the past week. A few nights ago, we talked for about 2 hours. We talked about everything: embarassing moments, religions, drinking, smoking (<---which we both do not like), etc. I even asked him if he was a virgina and he said yes. Then he asked me, and I replied with yes as well. When it was time for me to get to bed, I said goodbye and this is what he replied with: "Well perhaps we can chat a few more times before we meet in person. Always better to chat face to face." When I saw that I was like WHOA. I wouldn't mind going to meet him, but I have never done this before. I've been on dating websites and flirting with guys and then talk with some of them to see what they are all about, but this guy, somehow feels like a great guy to be around with. But how much longer should we chat online before actually meeting face-to-face? This is what I need help with. Please if there is anyone out there that can give me some good advice, I'd appreciate it immensely.

Thanks so much
DaisyGal10

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 03-23-2006 - 7:53pm

If it were me, I wouldn't chat online any longer...I would meet him for a cup of coffee in a public place ASAP to see if there is any connection in person.

Please keep in mind that nothing is real until you meet and get to know each other in person.

He should drive to your area to meet you, IMO, or meet somewhere halfway. But be sure to make it a public place like a Starbucks and tell someone where you are going. DO NOT go to his house (or have him come to yours) or get into his car. Safety first!!!

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2006
Fri, 03-24-2006 - 12:21am

Yup. Meet him. You might be surprised at how online chemistry and in-person chemistry are totally different. There's no need to drag it out - either you find out he IS the person he seems to be when you IM and chat or you find out otherwise. I think that this is one of the nice things about meeting people online, it's efficient! You can pick out the crazies from the goodies quickly.

True about the safety thing too. Don't let him know where you live until you actually get to know him well.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2006
Fri, 03-24-2006 - 9:17am

I completely agree with everyone else.

heather 5-18-10