Help-- Need Gift Idea

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-14-2003
Help-- Need Gift Idea
5
Thu, 10-16-2003 - 8:26pm
Hey-- looking for some advice on gift-giving. I met someone online about 4 months ago, and over the last like 6 weeks or so, we have been spending a lot of time together etc. Things are VERY nice, but pretty casual (which is my choice). Anyhow-- he has a birthday coming up.... I got him a book I know he will like, but I wanted to get him a little something else-- nothing too much. I know he likes music, movies-- but I don't know much about what he already owns...

Thanks for ANY input!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Thu, 10-16-2003 - 10:27pm

Well, personally, if we are not in a relationship he would get an e-card. I am not into sending things via mail unless it is confirmed. It has only been a few weeks and I would think he would look at it as a bit much. How would you feel someone you just met sending you gifts so soon? Maybe it is just me but it doesn't seem right and seems a bit much to soon.


I may be outside the norm since I do not do much of long distance but those I have, I've never sent gifts via mail until time had passed (meaning months) and they were something small, one thing. Please wait for other as I may be wrong. I have been doing this for a long while but I would say an e-card would be the best thing right now, unless you are just verifying his residence.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-07-2003
Thu, 10-16-2003 - 10:45pm
Hi,

Ooh, I sympathize w/you. Birthdays are tough when you've been seeing someone for a little while but aren't serious yet. I ran into this not too long ago w/ my bf - we were on the verge of breaking up just before his b-day and hadn't been dating that long. I ended up just taking him to a nice dinner and having a cake & card at my house for him, and he really enjoyed that. I would have done more than that had we not been in such a precarious situation at the time, though - things are much better now, so I think I'll make it up to him at Christmas :-).

Anyway . . . what I think I would do in your situation is take him out for a nice dinner, make or buy him a cake, and maybe get some other small gift, like a movie/cd you think he might like (don't get too hung up on whether he might already have it - if he does he can always exchange it). Or, since you're trying to keep things casual, you could even do a gift card - impersonal and normally not something I'd give to a bf, but since you're trying to stay casual . . .

Hope this was some help . . . :-)

ginger

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-14-2003
Fri, 10-17-2003 - 10:02am
THANKS Ginger-- good ideas. It is at an awkward stage. We are at the "what are WE doing this weekend" phase, but I have (so far) brushed off his attempts to be a true "couple". (I actually really, really, really like him, I just want to make sure we take things nice and slow...)

Funny-- I thought about a cake, but thought that somehow seemed TOO girlfriend-like, and hence I was opting for a casual-type gift.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-14-2003
Fri, 10-17-2003 - 10:11am
I guess I should have clarified-- it's not long distance. We are in the same city and have been dating for about 4 months-- in the last 6 weeks or so, it has moved to the we see each other very regularly, but we are not boyfriend/girlfriend phase. He has done a number of VERY nice things for me-- fixed a couple of things around my place etc. so I do want to mark his b-day by something friendly and nice-- I just don't want to go overboard and make either one of uncomfortable since things really are going so very nice!
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-07-2003
Fri, 10-17-2003 - 11:39am
If you aren't comfortable w/ a cake, then maybe a nice dessert at the restaurant? I personally think everyone needs a cake on their b-day though. :-) For me it isn't just a girlfriend thing - I make sure my friends get cakes on their bdays too, if I'm around.

Sounds like you're taking things at a good pace - good for you! :-)

ginger