Hilarious !!!! LOL

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Hilarious !!!! LOL
5
Wed, 04-06-2005 - 2:21pm

I received this email from a friend of mine:
Online-Dating Tips
More people are using computers to find that special someone. Here are some tips to help make your online-dating experience safe and fun:

Under no circumstance should you give someone you meet online a lot of personal information. You could place yourself in the dangerous position of having a date who knows what a loser you are.
When considering the serious step of marriage, it's good form to seek the approval of the message-board moderator.
Online dating services provide an easy way for recently divorced singles to meet new and interesting people. It's too bad your ex-wife got to keep the computer.
When you write your online classified ad, be sure to make explicit the fact that a sense of humor is very important to you.
Set yourself apart by choosing a descriptive user-name like SocialRetard342, CuteFaceFatAss, or RohypnolLarry.
If you're having a hard time finding a decent, commitment-minded man through e-dating, why don't you try to e-shut the f*ck up for once and stop your e-bitching.
Don't just tell women what they want to hear. Type it in all caps.
Remember, online dating is not for everyone—only the desperate and pathetic.
Dates like to know that they're appreciated. Go the extra mile and send that special someone an e-card or virtual flowers.
For best results, try whichever dating service happens to be advertised to the right or left of this chart.
If you decide to break up with your online mate, for God's sake, have the decency to do it over the phone.
If you're a man who prefers younger women, but you only seem to get responses from older women, take heart: Older women can give birth to younger women.
When getting together for the first time, arrange to meet online dates in an open, public place. That way, you can use binoculars to check them out from the car beforehand.
Don't worry. If you actually meet someone decent over the Internet, the two of you can tell people you met at a party.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-07-2005
Wed, 04-06-2005 - 2:25pm

Thanks for posting that Donna - it gave me a good laugh today!

Sunshine

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-03-2004
Wed, 04-06-2005 - 2:31pm

What a scream! thanks, donna.

Hey, jh, something else to add to your CL duties!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2003
Wed, 04-06-2005 - 2:41pm

Hmm....yes - I noticed that "theclevergirl" failed to consult me before she went ahead and got engaged.


This list is hilarious. I think we all can add some of our own "tips" for online dating.



  • You have to love to laugh and have fun; you must be okay dressing up or dressing down; you must enjoy both staying in and going out. If you don't meet these basic criteria - you'll never find a date online.

  • When you first start out online, contact all the hotties and players

 

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-07-2005
Wed, 04-06-2005 - 2:54pm

jh - how funny! You're additions are great!

The last one, "Save yourself time - copy other people's ads" really made me laugh because I had a guy copy mine word for word but replace the male words with female ones, then he actually winked at me and I saw he had copied my ad word for word! I couldn't believe he wanted me to see what he had done - did he think I would like that and say yeah baby?!!! Many different kinds of people online....

Ok here's my tip to add:
Email and IM with a guy for at least a month or longer before you actually meet him, so that you can get the initiation process over with of getting rejected, hurt, and let down, when you have built this relationship up in your head and nothing becomes of it when you finally meet. All must experience this at least once.

Sunshine

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Wed, 04-06-2005 - 3:35pm

Meet a person without a photo at least once, but not before you've spent time chatting with them on the phone and via IM.

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