Hit a bit of a snag...
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Hit a bit of a snag...
| Fri, 09-09-2005 - 11:41am |
A minor setback in "The Challenge". I've been emailing Mr. Monogamy for a few days and we were starting to hammer out the details of the first meet tomorrow. I get an e-mail this morning saying "I read your email and thinking that this was the perfect gal for me, but I'm looking for someone who has weekends off. Good Luck".
To be fair, his profile does say that he's looking for someone who is free on the weekends if there is a connection. I currently work week-ends. I'm a bartender in a restaurant and have top seniority. My schedule is what it is because I made it that way as it suits my life at the moment. I can change it whenever I want, but I didn't feel the need to offer up that information prior to even meeting someone. Had we met and had we liked each other, I would have offered up that possibiltiy down the road. Now my profile clearly states that I'm a bartender and a free-lance costume designer. I don't know but doesn't that imply I'm not a 9-5er?
I was entering this in my dating diary and a couple questions popped into my head that I thought I'd put out to you all.
Is it possible that I just pushed the meet too soon for him and he just got scared?
More important: If this weekend thing is a dealbreaker for people what's the best way for me to address this (my flexibility) without sounding like...If I like you I'm willing to change my whole routine for you. Ironically I had been contemplating that move just before my last boyfriend dumped me, but we'd been dating for 2 months and I never even mentioned it to him nor had he asked it of me.
Anyway I could write Mr. Monogamy back and explain this but I'm not going to.
To be fair, his profile does say that he's looking for someone who is free on the weekends if there is a connection. I currently work week-ends. I'm a bartender in a restaurant and have top seniority. My schedule is what it is because I made it that way as it suits my life at the moment. I can change it whenever I want, but I didn't feel the need to offer up that information prior to even meeting someone. Had we met and had we liked each other, I would have offered up that possibiltiy down the road. Now my profile clearly states that I'm a bartender and a free-lance costume designer. I don't know but doesn't that imply I'm not a 9-5er?
I was entering this in my dating diary and a couple questions popped into my head that I thought I'd put out to you all.
Is it possible that I just pushed the meet too soon for him and he just got scared?
More important: If this weekend thing is a dealbreaker for people what's the best way for me to address this (my flexibility) without sounding like...If I like you I'm willing to change my whole routine for you. Ironically I had been contemplating that move just before my last boyfriend dumped me, but we'd been dating for 2 months and I never even mentioned it to him nor had he asked it of me.
Anyway I could write Mr. Monogamy back and explain this but I'm not going to.


Do you actually SAY in your profile that you work weekends? Because I wouldn't automatically assume that based on what you've put here about your work.
Re "pushing" for a meeting...my feeling is that people are (or should be) online to MEET, not do the endless email thing, and if they are not willing or are "scared" to meet, then good riddance.
Sheri
Why not email him and let him know?
I suspect he got nervous and you're right... good riddance. That's why I didn't even consider writing him back to explain.
Edited 9/9/2005 12:30 pm ET ET by cheleinsf