How do you keep your emotions out of it?
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| Fri, 02-18-2005 - 9:51am |
Okay, tonight is supposed to be my third meet with someone, and I'm SOOOOOOOOO afraid that I'm starting to care.
In case you just started reading, I've had "problems" in the past where I cared about the other person too prematurely and got hurt. Of course, I bounced back and continued and said our motto: "NEXT!" But still, the hurting sucked. The wondering if I'll hear from the person, the process of being blown off because the person liked someone else better, you know the story - the facts of life. And I'm sure I've done that to people too. But it just sucked being on the "being hurt" side of the coin.
SO, now I am really concerned that I am starting to like this guy, possibly prematurely, and I want to STOP!
Please give me advice on how to NOT like someone so much............
ORRRRR, please promise me that you will be there when I get hurt again because I let my heart start to get involved, and come crying to you all for support.

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Wow, this really hit home. The guy I've been seeing for 3 weeks just told me he loves me. On our second date, he started talking about all the things we'll do this summer. He's been divorced for six years and has made it clear he really wants to get married again. All well and good but I'm not sure how I feel about him. I've asked him to slow down, pointing out we haven't known each other very long, to say the least.
This situation is very odd for me; usually I'm the one rushing ahead of myself and the guy starts backing off after the third date or so.
On the Living Single board someone recently complained about not experiencing a middle ground -either they ghost after a date or two or they're practically stalking you. I know what she means :)
Edited 2/19/2005 8:38 am ET ET by icarrie141
Yikes!!! 3 weeks???? That would freak me out too...I've learned my lesson about fast starts. I think someone who actually thinks they are in love after 3 weeks is just as emotionally unhealthy (in a different way, of course) as someone who isn't open to love at all. You'd think he would have learned the difference between love and infatuation by now! Not that you're not loveable, of course ;-)...but you know what I mean, I'm sure.
So what did you say to him????
Sheri
Yeah, maybe you're right about that. Especially because giving the "mixed me up with Mary" dude another chance was a complete waste of my time. It's a good thing that I had plans to meet some friends at a local club after the "date" so the night wasn't completely wasted.
Ah well, should've listened to your all's advice on this one.
Hey :) Hope you're having a good weekend! First off, and I'm sort of pissed about this, but the next night - the following day after I posted that he called me Mary, he called me Mary AGAIN on the frekin phone. And this time it got me a little PO'd actually. So I think perhaps my attitude was already very negative about the whole thing..... It's not that anything bad happened, it's just that we didn't click. I mean, I totally do NOT care if someone is dating others, or even has been dating one other for a long time, or whatever.... but at least make me feel special, and don't throw it in my face so much. I guess it's just not something I could live with. I dunno, maybe the guy has a problem with keeping all the names straight in his life, but that's not my problem, and what's clear to me is that since it got me mad, it's not something I'll be able to live with. Anyways, at least I got a free martini out of it ;)
Cheers! Have a nice weekend, amjay :)
<Sheri>>
I was afraid someone was going to ask that :) I basically pretended I didn't hear him and changed the subject. It wasn't as awkward as it sounds because he didn't seem to expect the "I Love You return" (if I may lift from Seinfeld :)
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