How long before answering a mail?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-14-2006
How long before answering a mail?
4
Tue, 08-15-2006 - 10:58am

As a rule, what's the minimum time before answering a guy's e-mails (regardless of the time he takes for writing in the first place) ?

I tend to go through my mail everyday when I go home, and, like with the business stuff, I like to get 'everything done' as soon as possible. Which means that I often answer on the same or next day - just because I don't want to forget about them and end up spending a whole evening answering all kinds of mails when it's too late. I'm not desperate, I'm just busy and therefore organized - but I don't want anyone to think that I was actually *waiting* for their mails. I know I'm terrible at 'playing hard to get' - I just hate playing games, even if I know I should. It's not fun !

So, what do you think ?

Edited 8/15/2006 10:59 am ET by gaby362




Edited 8/15/2006 11:00 am ET by gaby362
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-21-2003
Tue, 08-15-2006 - 12:53pm
I'm totally clueless on this one! What I have learned is that I'm doing it wrong. I don't play the hard to get games, but seems like I might have to start. I had been responding to some CL ads for things like "let's meet for dinner" "no expectations" etc as I am not looking for a relationship, but would like to go out and meet people. They'll see my pic, and say, "sure let's do it, you're cute". I reply pretty quickly and suggest a day. Then they vanish. So... I know I'm doing something wrong since they initially replied that they like my pic but obviously didn't like, either the quickness of the reply, or the no-nonsense cut-to-the-chase taking-the-initiative approach. Oh well... so be it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2006
Tue, 08-15-2006 - 6:23pm
Especially with online dating, honesty is the best policy. So "playing hard to get" in my opinion has no business in that arena. You are an organized person and so respond as quickly as convenient, nothing wrong with that and I'm sure your reply emails don't sound "needy".
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-01-2005
Tue, 08-15-2006 - 6:46pm
Honestly, I think of it like business. I wouldn't let a customer's email go unanswered for two days, would I? If he thinks I'm needy for being on top of my life, then he's not my type.



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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-14-2006
Wed, 08-16-2006 - 3:56am

I don't believe in playing games with people; I believe in being myself and sincere and honest. There are numerous "rules" regarding OLD and one of them is to not reply to e-mails for 24-48 hrs. I have no idea what that is all about. I don't believe in those types of rules - who comes up with them anyway?

You do what makes you feel comfortable - just be you.

I have found that some men will reply within a day, and others have waited for up to a week between e-mails. But, that's their choice.

I am like you in that I perfer to keep caught up on e-mails and don't base the timing of my replies on the clock or calendar.

There is already too much mental gymnastics going on and I don't choose to participate.