How long do you wait?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-14-2005
How long do you wait?
5
Mon, 12-19-2005 - 10:12pm

I'm curious-- when you gals start dating a new guy (and it looks like it may actually go somewhere), how long do you usually wait before you have sex with him?
3 dates? 5? A month? 6 months??

Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 12-19-2005 - 10:59pm

I have found it's best to wait until you've dated steadily for at least 6-8 weeks. Any time I've not followed that guideline with respect to a potential LTR, I've regretted it. It takes a while to get to know someone well enough to begin to know if they are reliable, trustworthy, etc. Sometimes I think 2 months isn't even long enough...if I could I'd wait 3-4 months, but I don't think I'd be able to hold out that long ;-).

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-23-2003
Tue, 12-20-2005 - 8:53am

I don't have a rule about when to become intimate. Each person and relationship is unique. I think it's best to be true to yourself and keep it real. Sex is very individual. Personally I don't think sex should be had because you're pressured or think that the relationship won't go anywhere if you don't, but at the same time I can't apply a rule about how many dates, or weeks or months before I'd feel comfortable in sharing that experience.


Solazzo

Solazzo
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2005
Tue, 12-20-2005 - 8:23pm
I think having sex too early can be a risk for most women because it clouds our judgment and makes us feel more attached than we should be. Waiting is great for that reason, but if a guy is really into you and ready for a relationship, sleeping with him sooner rather than later doesn't matter - at least it hasn't in any of my long-term relationships.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Wed, 12-21-2005 - 12:01am
I guess it varies... for me, if I am serious about a guy I would wait a few months so that I know him well enough and that when it comes to sex it would be love making as opposed to just sex if you know what I mean.
Avatar for incognito_mosquito
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Wed, 12-21-2005 - 12:15am

"I'm curious-- when you gals start dating a new guy (and it looks like it may actually go somewhere), how long do you usually wait before you have sex with him?"

A couple of hours.