how long should I wait?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-23-2006
how long should I wait?
4
Sat, 12-02-2006 - 10:27am
.


Edited 12/4/2006 7:32 pm ET by summer_71
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Sat, 12-02-2006 - 1:56pm

A month is a long time. When someone keeps emailing incessantly and seems to have no intention of meeting anytime soon - ESPECIALLY when you have mentioned several times about meeting? I hate that! Sounds like either a newbie or someone that talks big and has no intention of meeting you. If I were you, I would say something like this, "I have really enjoyed talking to you but I got online to MEET people, not just find a pen pal. Would you like to meet for coffee next weekend?" You can insert lunch, a drink, a walk, whatever activity you'd like to do there, but I suggest keeping it to something short and during the day. Dinner is usually bad - you're captive if things are not going well. Drinks are also usually a bad idea - alcohol and everything!

Anyway, if he doesn't bite on that one or gets wishy-washy, I would tell him good-bye.

131.gif image by y_baros th5K.gif image by jade_simo

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-17-2006
Sat, 12-02-2006 - 10:29pm

I agree. I dislike it when I feel I always have to be the one to take the initiative! Give it a shot and if he doesn't step up, it's his loss!

Pink

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-09-2003
Sun, 12-03-2006 - 6:49am

Um, this is curious. Either he is very shy and scared to take it to the next level, or (and hopefully not) he is already involved with someone else, or worse, married!

There are no rules anymore as to who asks whom out on a date. Would you feel comfortable initiating a meeting with him? If you do ask him out and he keeps flaking out on you, I'd scratch him off the list. You don't need to get involved with someone who is playing headgames with you.

I hope I'm wrong, but this situation would make me wonder what is going on with him.

And, the fact that he asked if you would be at the gym on a particular night seems ironic since you never saw him. That makes me think he wanted to ensure he didn't run into you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2006
Mon, 12-04-2006 - 5:19am
Hey there, I've been dating on line for about 9 months now. I've come acrossed men who were hesitant to meet. It is usually due to them having something to hide. I'm sorry, but it's true. Maybe not in your case, but it was in mine. I'd be careful with the ones who don't want to meet. Good luck!