How many emails are enough? Or too many?
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| Mon, 07-31-2006 - 6:40pm |
Newbie question...I got a match from a website, and we have exchanged two emails. Verrrrrry nice guy so far. I don't have high expectations and this will be my first online date, so I have every intention of keeping it casual (yet why do I check my email 20 times a day?)
I do NOT want to email too much---I'd much rather have a real life friend. IMHO it is time to meet---but I'm booked solid for the next two weeks, then I have a whole week available (no work, no kids, no nothin!). I would really like to finagle a meet for that week.
SO, how to play it? Set up the date now, then avoid corresponding until then? Or avoid corresponding too much, and then set up a meet? Should I tell him I don't want to email, or just leave him hanging? Who am I kidding? I'm the one hanging today....

Welcome to the Board! I'd say that yes, right now you are impatient; however, that's understandable. You can read all sorts of "rules" about online connections, but in the final analysis the decision is up to the two of you.
My personal rules are that I want to write back and forth enough times to feel we have a enough in common, and if he offers his phone number I'll call him (ensuring my name/number do not show up on his caller ID)...after having several conversations, if we both feel as though we are comfortable with each other, have mutual interests etc., then we'll may make plans to meet for coffee or such.
You may want to view some of the online dating tips that are available on the internet.
Use good judgement and lead with your brain, not your heart.
Too many of the men who "sounded" great ended up having court records that made me turn away from them. Hopefully your county offers online search of court records.
Listen and watch for any inconsistencies in what he is telling you. There are many men who are looking for a nurse or a purse.....and yet, there are good men out there, but it takes patience and persistence to weed them out.
Good luck, and keep us posted.
Katie
Hi and welcome to the board and OLD!
R-E-L-A-X!
I know its exciting, but dont over-think this. I dont get though, this: "Set up the date now, then avoid corresponding until then?"
Email is what the dating sites are set up for. It's fun and it's safe. It also allows you to be very honest about what you are looking for and who you are. On line dating is a great way to meet your match ( I did ). We emailed for two weeks before I would agree to meet him. By the second week it was up to 6 or 8 a day. What fun and anticipation. I still have all of them and they are precious to me. He even admits to going back and reading the early ones. We were crazy, flirty, amazed, and falling in love. We felt like we were teenagers again. Of course we both admitted to being nervous about actually meeting. What if we didn't like each other after all? But we did and we are still in love after 2 years. So, go for the emails and have fun. The only rules to online dating are: Until you meet and are sure he is not a psycho and that you really do like him, no last names, no phone numbers, no addresses, no telling him where you work. Good luck.
Deb