How public is this board????

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-01-2006
How public is this board????
10
Sun, 12-17-2006 - 10:15pm

It has occurred to me that I have explained details about various dates and relationships on this board and although I don't use real names (not even my real name), I've given enough details so that the men I am talking about would recognize themselves and the situation. And since it is OLD these guys are probably familiar with this type of venue (I know people, men and women, in real life who don't even know what a message board is, so I wouldn't worry so much if it wasn't OLD).

Am I just being paranoid? Has anyone actually had a guy stumble across a post you've written about the date you and he had? Has it ever caused any real problems? iVillage is a pretty popular site and anyone with half a brain could find their way to this board??? Oh, please tell me I'm worrying for nothing. Hot-instant-spark guy ghosted, and I know it's a good thing, but now I'm all paranoid that he was really a nice guy and I just ticked him off my blabbing all about how he is a player. Ugh...any thoughts?




Edited 12/18/2006 12:32 am ET by lostbee4
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2008
Sun, 12-17-2006 - 10:32pm
Hi Lostbee4, I wouldn't worry about anything. There are millions of people who probably visit the ivillage community.
:) Devorah


Edited 12/18/2006 12:54 am ET by chanadevorah
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 12-18-2006 - 12:29am

I think the chances are pretty slim that someone's going to recognize you on here, but just in case, I would choose a different handle for dating if I were you...I have 2 different yahoo accounts for personal emails, one I use for correspondence with friends from Ivillage (that corresponds to my ID here), one I use exclusively for OLD that is completely different and unrelated to this ID.

And I really don't think he was a nice guy who read about himself on here--and I think you know that in your heart.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-01-2006
Mon, 12-18-2006 - 12:34am

"Hi Lostbee4, If I were you, I'd edit your post to remove the info about what your IDs are at various places."

Done! Ugh, now I really feel dumb! Thank you, thank you, thank you!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Mon, 12-18-2006 - 2:26am

I have often wondered/worried about that too. MANY people these daysa re very computer saavy.


1 thing i CAN say is if you google "on line dating message boards" ... THIS is the VERY 1st thing to come up! THIS board! lol


So .... if your guy is compuer literate AT ALL ... I would NOT mentoin anything about being on an on line dating message board.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2006
Mon, 12-18-2006 - 8:08am
People can Google you by your handle, so if you regularly use "lostbee4" in other places, they can find all your posts here. I just learned this myself! Thank goodness my email address isn't exactly the same handle as my posts here and on other message boards!
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
Mon, 12-18-2006 - 8:20am

"Has anyone actually had a guy stumble across a post you've written about the date you and he had? Has it ever caused any real problems?"


One time, yes.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2003
Mon, 12-18-2006 - 10:30am

Nine men out of ten DO NOT read message boards. They don't sit around and discuss relationships and they really don't want to read about women discussing THEIR relationships.

This is truly a woman-thing. Don't worry about it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Mon, 12-18-2006 - 11:24am

I think the chances are slim that someone would come across your posts about them. Besides, it really is anonymous out here and no one knows you or him so it's not like people could identify him out in public or anything. I wouldn't worry about it if I were you.

But I also agree with Sheri - I don't think he was all that nice of a guy whether he read the posts and got scared or not!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-29-2003
Mon, 12-18-2006 - 3:33pm

The only time that happened was with my ex BF – I made the mistake of telling him about the board and he went, found it and did a search for all my posts under my name unbeknownst me.

Avatar Image"The Small Peanu
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-25-2006
Tue, 12-19-2006 - 2:02am

I can't believe you would post stuff about our dates! Just kidding...;)

Here are a couple of tips for you.

1. Clear, clear, clear the history on your browser. Especially if he/she ever happens to use your computer.

2. Never, never, never use a handle, screen name, etc that is even remotely similar to your name, your email address or any other screen name that you use.

Klaus Heinz
Common Sense Coach
www.topdateonline.com