How should I take this?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-12-2008
How should I take this?
Thu, 03-04-2010 - 8:55pm

Hey everyone, I'm new to the board and new-ish to OLD. Thats how I met my last boyfriend, it didn't end up working here I am again!

So I've been chatting with this guy for a while about our respective careers, hobbies etc, nothing scandalous. Today I get this message that says "I am done with this site, if you wanna text me thats fine . Have a good one. " I text? Between our conversations and my e-stalking (you know you all do it!) he seemed like a decent guy and I was actually going to suggest we meet...but this last message makes him sound like a bit of a jerk....


iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Mon, 03-22-2010 - 1:03pm

I don't think the message makes him a jerk per se, but it sounds like his interest level is pretty low to moderate.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2010
Mon, 03-22-2010 - 11:03am
Don't text him. You are clearly just an option to him, and he was putting out a fish line. I don't think he has his eye out for you. It sounds like he had a bad experience with someone else who he really liked hence the "im done...". You were like collateral to him.
Do NOT text him! He sounds like a jerk.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2010
Sat, 03-20-2010 - 9:28pm

You said you’ve been chatting with him “awhile”.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2009
Sat, 03-20-2010 - 5:03pm

How should you take it?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-02-2003
Wed, 03-10-2010 - 7:43am

Seems to me that if he was truly not interested, he would have ghosted (disappeared without telling you he was leaving the site or contacting you again)

If you are interested, send him a text and see what happens, if he doesn't return it then you'll know for sure.

him inviting you to text wasn't classy, but hey, times are a changin.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-18-2007
Sat, 03-06-2010 - 8:22am
I agree with Mark. Move on. He could have said, let's meet. If someone is interested enough, they make an effort. Sounds like this guy isn't.
Never give all the heart, for love...
If someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Fri, 03-05-2010 - 11:01am
If it's a paid site, maybe his membership is running out & he just doesn't want to renew it. If you don't like texting, maybe you could just text him so he has your phone no and say that you would prefer it if he called you, then the ball is in his court. If he's too lazy to pick up the phone after you told him that you don't like texting, then I wouldn't really bother.
Avatar for mhash
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 03-04-2010 - 9:57pm

I think how we communicate is generational. So if you two are in your teens or 20 something then that's one thing. I believe if he wants to get to know you then he will ask you for your phone number and chat/ask you out. Otherwise move on and forget about him.


We're fools whether we dance or not, so we might as well dance. ~Japanese Proverb