How to stop being so judgmental?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2009
How to stop being so judgmental?
12
Fri, 07-08-2011 - 11:20pm

I have been OLD now for a few months and I am not sure if I am being too picky.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-22-2004
Sat, 07-09-2011 - 8:11am

Hello.

It doesn't seem like you're being too picky. You're just meeting men with whom you're not compatible. This could happen in any situation, whether you meet online or the traditional way. Doesn't make sense to get involved with someone who wants kids if you don't, or in a relationship where neither of you is willing to relocate. It's smart of you to move on, instead of wasting your time and the other person's time by going through the motions.

As for the guy who's been married twice, if your intuition is telling you that there's something "off" about him, there probably is. Too often, we ignore those feelings and end up in trouble. Of course, I do acknowledge that it

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Sat, 07-09-2011 - 9:43am

I don't think you're being too judgmental--I think you're being smart.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2010
Sat, 07-09-2011 - 9:29pm

I don't know if you're being judgmental or picky but it's so important to listen to your gut and make the right decisions for you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2009
Sat, 07-09-2011 - 10:31pm

I haven't been on 5 dates.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2008
Sat, 07-09-2011 - 10:50pm
Nope, you're not being judgmental...that's the whole point of dating! To meet someone compatible. And unfortunatley, it's rare. I've been on probably 20+ date sin the last 18 months... most of them online, a few I met at the bar, two were friend set ups. It's to the point now I know within 5 min. if I'm going to want to see them again! I take regular breaks from OLD myself. Actually just met someone at a local outdoor event last week, and we are going out next week! I so prefer to meet someone "in real life" than online, just for the simple fact that you know if there is mutual chemistry between you immediately. With OLD, you have to meet and then see if there's chemistry.. usually not, or if there is, something comes out in conversation that's a dealbreaker (either for you or him... it goes both ways!)
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-05-2010
Sun, 07-10-2011 - 12:57am

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2011
Wed, 07-13-2011 - 9:52am
All of these examples are of you being smart about dating, and
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2009
Wed, 07-13-2011 - 2:36pm

Thank you all so much for your encouragement.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2011
Wed, 07-13-2011 - 6:49pm

Don't be hard on yoursefl! You aren't being judgemental, you're just meeting people who aren't great fits for you.

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Community Leader
Registered: 01-25-2010
Wed, 07-13-2011 - 9:13pm

Hi

Go out to have fun!

chaika

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