I am I really being fair
Find a Conversation
| Mon, 02-13-2006 - 8:59pm |
A couple of weeks ago I went out with a guy I met on an online site. Talking online was great I thought he was what I was looking for but when we actually met and went out
I wasn't overly impressed by him. He wanted to go out the following week which I gave a lame excuse why I couldn't and said I would call and didn't. I went out with him during a time at which I was casually involved with someone else, which at that point seemed to be leading in the right direction. That relationship came to an abrupt end last week, the very next day the online guy MSNed me and we started chatting. I like chatting to him online but get so nervous on the phone or in person. I don't even know if it is nerves or I just don't like talking to him in person. So now he wants to go out again...which I agreed to but now I am not so sure....But part of me wonders if I ever gave him a fair chance to begin with because in some ways my heart was set on this other guy. But now I don't know if I am giving the guy a fair chance because it's a time where the first relationship has ended and it also comes at a time where my very good friend has started to plan her wedding. I know that as happy I am for her I still feel a little sorry for myself that it's not me planning the wedding. It totally has nothing to do with needing a date for her wedding because it's not for a while, in case that's what anyone is thinking.
Is it fair for me to go out with this guy again? Should I even bother if he didn't really impress me the first time. I don't know if I am giving this a guy a "second chance" because I think he deserves one or because I don't want to be alone right now. Any words of advice?

I vote, give yourself a week or so to mull things over a bit. It sounds like you've had a few things on your mind lately, but you might not want to re-think that first impression too hard either (been there and kicked myself in the pants for it later). Frankly, and this is only speaking for myself, if the spark wasn't there the first time, it usually isn't there the next go around.
Was there anything in particular you noticed about him the first time that "didn't do it" for you? Are you sure it was because Mr. Maybe was still in the picture?
Might not be a bad idea to sit back and relax a bit, do a little soul searching first.