"I don't look my age" thing
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| Wed, 03-02-2005 - 10:17am |
Hi Ya'll,
Being 48,I get mail from a lot of men over 45 who put out that disclaimer: "I don't look my age". What is Wrong with looking your age? I don't mean Jabba the Hut in a Rip Van Winkle beard, but I DO have a few lines on my face and I do cover the little grey hair I have. I would not trade where I am for Anything.
This, I have found, also ends up being a person who is VERY stuck on appearances and very judgemental of what others are like. Like Hallmark/Insurance man said "all women over 40 look like cardboard boxes"...wow, I was UPset at That one, and should have walked out of the restaurant! (live and learn, I Would now!:) Plus, they often DO look 'good' for their age, but they DO look very near their age.
I avoided putting any reference to looking younger than my years, and would be glad to give my Match profile name here to prove my point. If they Have to point something out that is Obvious, do you all feel that kinda becomes a "pre-red flag"?
What say you?
Truly,
Cupcake

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I see that all the time, and it really bugs me. What's wrong with being our age? Nothing. Get over it, already!
The ones who say this are usually the ones whose age range search is 18-35.
I always think to myself, "Let *me* be the judge of that, thank you very much!".
I think it's a silly, silly thing to say, and I generally will skip over profiles with that line in it.
Sheri
If they write "I look younger than my age" then you might as well as write "and I don't look anything like my profile photo" --- because assuming they have a photo I'm trusting that they look reasonably close to it.
I've only had one person who didn't look like their photo - and most looked better.
cupcakechic...
As most regular ivillagers know by now....Pianoguy has a problem with the words: AGE and OLD!
Hi Cupcake,
When I see in a guy's profile "I look younger than my age" I automatically think he has problems with accepting his age and therefore may have other issues which probably include accepting anyone over 40 who doesn't fit the criteria of being pencil thin, very pretty, and with long hair and big boobs.
When I first stared doing OLD, I met with a couple of guys like that and found them to be very critical people in many aspects of their lives and of the lives of women. They just had an overall feel of not really being happy and accepting of themselves, like they were trying to be someone else. I know I'm generalizing and I'm sure not all of them are like that though.
Now I pass by the ones who comment about looking younger than their age. So in answer to your question, yes it is a red flag for me.
Sunshine
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Preach it, sistah! I've noticed that too and it's tres annoying. And I find that most of those guys are a tad delusional about their looks.
I think the ones who claim not to look their age are stuck on looks to the exclusion of all else. They don't have the depth to realize age is more than looks -- it's experience, it's growing up in the same context, it's stage of life, it's maturity. I don't want a guy much more than 5 years younger or older than me because he'll be at a different place than I am. At my age of 48, I'm thinking ahead -- I think retiring at about the same time would be a good thing. that may sound awful but it's practical.
Sometimes I have seen women write (paraphrasing): "Even though I'm 48, I seem to have more in common with guys 10 to 15 years younger than me."
What these women don't suspect is that they are merely FWB's.
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