I dont think it's going to happen
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|Wed, 07-02-2003 - 1:06am|
Well my excitment is gone from me meeting my friend CJ. In my mind, I don't think it is going to happen, in my heart I don't think it is going to happen. I mean it is July and we havent figured out anything about us meeting. I havent talked to him in a week. When I see him on-line, I hurry up and sign-off so he wont think I am "looking for him" or some crap like that. I tried to call but no answer and not a return phone call. I feel real silly being "Heartbroken" over a guy that I haven't even met in person. I mean I just thought that he would be different. I don't know if I ran him off or what and I have a feeling that I won't ever know. I guess I believed all of the stuff that he has been telling me over the last five months. Discovering how much we have in common and etc...
I have a feeling that he was telling me all of thet stuff just to pacify me. You know to keep me content. I guess he got tired of saying them because he didn't mean them. Have any of you ever felt like that someone on the other side was telling you osomething just to pacify you? Cause that it was what you wanted to hear?
Like I said in my mind I dont think it is going to happen. But my heart is saying a totally differen thing. It is saying that it will happen and to keep hope alive. I don't know what to follow? I guess if you can help it would be great. If not thanks for lsitening because I know that none of my friends would understand.