I need alittle advice
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I need alittle advice
| Wed, 04-13-2005 - 8:55am |
I hid my profile on match about 3 weeks ago. About 2 weeks ago I was searching and saw someone interesting so I unhid myself and emailed him. I checked back a couple of days later and his profile was hidden, so I figured he wasn't interested or taking a break. whatever. So I went back into hiding phase (and my subscription expires 4/16 and I'm not renewing). Well, I got a reply email from him last night saying he just signed on and his kids put him up to this. So I guess when I originally saw him he wasn't a paying member. Here's my question...do I unhid myself and reply so he can see my profile? He did give me his real email address so I could email him that way but I can't forward a picture thru my computer (I'm having issues with downloading). When you 'unhid' your profile are you seen right away? I had pretty much written match.com off due to no activity.

>>he just signed on and his kids put him up to this.
Hearing that anyone put "someone up to" online dating sends shivers up my spine.
-are they serious
-is it some ruse they hid behind when they dump you - similar to the "friends first"
-do they really want to date or is it an ego boost?
What I would do is unhide my profile and send an email and then on a scale of interest where 1 is low and 10 is high -- put him no higher than a 5. I would strictly adhere to a 3 or 4 email rule and then stop if he doesn't arrange to meet. Under no circumstances would I renew my membership just for him - unless I was already planning to renew. As a non-paying member you can be on view for free anyhow - so unhiding your profile is very low risk unless there are other issues that you haven't posted about such as someone else seeing it, etc.
Hi Donna,
I agree with CGUN, I would send off a quick little email to his own email address; like "nice to hear from you, how is your week going?"-ish. Do remember that why he hid his profile and you hid yours has Nothing to do with You and Him..ie, you all had not met, so it did not matter 'why'. I find that I often would 'buzzard' something and over-worry (which I have a Master's degree in! "Overworry for Dummies", my new book out in '06!)and not just let it flow.
Let him know that your profile is unhidden and that you would like to see his, if you have not. My only red flag would be if he says he does not want to let you see it on and live...that would say he is hiding something From someone? 50/50 chance, but find out the 4-1-1..the truth usually walks right up to you, given time!
An OLD thing: Do y'all feel that you really Wonder why people seem to need to 'qualify' being OLD? "My kids made me", "I can't believe I am doing this", etcetera-age! Here, that is called 'crawfishing', as it is peeking out of your mud hole and then retreating back in quickly! Hey, have the Guts to stand by your convictions--Do It, Live it, is the Way here on Planet Cupcake.
Best of Luck, Donna, sometimes it is these that start out kinda different that end up as keepers!! :)
Truly,
Cupcake
Good luck!!
amjay
Next..............
Yeah, what LG said:
>>he just signed on and his kids put him up to this.
"Hearing that anyone put "someone up to" online dating sends shivers up my spine."
I don't believe that line for a second.
A newbie question:
Does he have to be a paying member to reply to an email?
Okay. My point is, if he's the reluctant OLD'er like he says, he would hardly be investing in a subscription would he?
Very suspicious.