If the Woman Winks...

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2004
If the Woman Winks...
5
Wed, 04-05-2006 - 7:10pm
I have been OLD for about 2.5 years. 90% of the time, I *respond* to winks and e-mails. Sometimes I do an actual search and against my better judgement, *I wink* at men I'd like to get to know. A good majority of the time (more often than not) they don't wink back!! I can see they've viewed my profile (I'm on Match which has that feature) but I don't understand why my winking is such a bad thing? Aren't they sick of having to do all the work? Don't they think it's a nice change to have the woman make the first move? Okay, now I'm feeling insecure enough to think there may be a red flag or two in my profile. I'm satori_in_NV on Match. Please take a look and see what I'm doing wrong.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-03-2004
Wed, 04-05-2006 - 9:27pm
I don't see that you're doing anything wrong exactly. The feeling I do get from your profile is that you're looking at what they have to add and not necessarily what you would bring. That's o.k., but some men might feel intimidated and others may think it sounds self-centered. I don't know that. I really don't know what goes through men's minds a lot of times. However, I do know they're looking for someone who is going to be into them. That's what's tricky about dating to me. You pretty much have to put the same thing out there for both the good men and the bad ones. Then you have to weed through the bad responses. If one tries too hard to screen the bad ones prematurely, a lot of the good ones are scared away as well. However, I still think your profile is good. You sound very intelligent, which may intimidate some men. Good luck.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Wed, 04-05-2006 - 10:47pm

Hmmm - 1st off, i would date you

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2003
Thu, 04-06-2006 - 7:05pm

"I've been in the dating scene long enough to know what I don't want but have a hard time pinpointing exactly what I'm looking for in a relationship. I know it when I feel and experience it, I guess. "

I would remove the part of not being able to pinpoint exactly what you re looking for. It might be misread for not knowing what you want and smart men would avoid you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-01-2005
Thu, 04-06-2006 - 9:20pm

Overall, I like your profile...The pictures are great.

I do agree with Rebecca though...the idiosyncrasy part needs to be explained. Men are going to wonder what's wrong with you. :-) Even if you didn't mean anything by the comment, they're going to think something is seriously wrong.

I did just notice that you say you don't drink. That might be a dealbreaker for some guys (or maybe the guys I know are just drunks).







iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2004
Mon, 04-10-2006 - 5:31pm

I took all of your advice and I re-wrote my profile text. How's this:

My friends would describe me as loyal, intelligent, attractive, down to earth, eclectic, artsy, well read and a huge dog lover. I try to find humor in most situations I come across and appreciate that same quality in others. I think I'm pretty good at reading people but I try not to make snap judgements. I know it takes people awhile to get to know me so I extend that patience to others as well.

I would like to meet someone that is intelligent, funny, isn't always on the go, likes dogs, is compassionate and doesn't live like a frat boy. I am attracted to men who are a little different than the norm, are very kind hearted, have a goofy side and are comfortable in own their skin. Confidence and passion are must have qualities as well.

Hopefully this is better!!