Incident to Share.....

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-01-2005
Incident to Share.....
46
Tue, 11-08-2005 - 12:46pm

I thought I was madly in love with my High School boyfriend.

CL-Truewild1969

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-01-2005
Thu, 11-10-2005 - 12:39pm

"Jodie, this is NOT about seeking an old flame so you can brag about how great your life is, or how good you look"

CL-Truewild1969

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-18-2004
Thu, 11-10-2005 - 2:22pm

I do think some are being a bit harsh here on Jodie..

so she contacted an old flame. yes there maybe have been some hidden agenda on her part but it's not fair to project our issues /thoughts on her.. she did not cheat on Ronnie and yes maybe she needed to reassure herself that she has a good man and not compare apples to apples. what she had w/ this guy 18 years ago was different then what she has w/ Ronnie and possibly that is what she needed answer.

whatever the reason Jodie- you did it for whatever reasons you were curious about to help /or encourage your feelings about ronnie.

I am going through the same thing great guy/just dating him and figure things out as we go along.. he is the stable rock that i need.. so i keep moving forward..as i am not use to having stable rocks I am use to being the stable rock.. so it's a good nice feeling but sometimes i struggle too.

so if it helped you great and NO why would you tell ronnie, you did nothing wrong.. all I was saying was there definitely was a hidden reason why you did it and you got your own answer!! :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2005
Thu, 11-10-2005 - 2:27pm

If Ronnie is a significant other you must definitely tell him. I am suspect that you questioned it if this truly was an innocent thing. Think how you would feel if you found out he had done the same thing and not told you. You really need to think twice about continuing this because I don't think it's a good idea if you are involved with another man. Stop it before it gets too far.

F

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-14-2005
Thu, 11-10-2005 - 8:06pm

"See, you can't even post a simple question w/out everyone psycho analyzing you're character and finding hidden meaning in your agenda hence why I don't post much anymore unless I give advice."

It's a public message board for cripes sakes. Anybody can post anything as long as it doesn't violate TOS. Why take it so seriously? So people have opinions about the situation. Big deal. If you're going to post, you're free game. If you can't handle other opinions, advice or comments (which you refer to as psycho-analyzing), then don't post.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-14-2005
Thu, 11-10-2005 - 8:11pm

I think there's a difference between googling someone and actually setting up a profile to bait them. And if it were really no big deal, why not just tell him? He's such a great guy and all, he'd probably be just fine with it. Like you would be if the shoe were on the other foot as you stated previously.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-14-2005
Thu, 11-10-2005 - 8:13pm
Love the first paragraph. Whether she tells him or not is totally up to her. I am just curious as why she wouldn't. That's all.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-14-2005
Thu, 11-10-2005 - 8:16pm
Exactly.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-18-2004
Thu, 11-10-2005 - 10:45pm


"He's such a great guy and all, he'd probably be just fine with it. Like you would be if the shoe were on the other foot as you stated previously."

if the shoe were on the other foot she would probably see that it was also totally something very innocent and just out of curiousity.. she did not cheat on the guy. she merely wrote him an email. so what! it was the love of her life at one time..

you pick and choose your battles.there is no reason to give Ronnie any reason to wonder that Jodie is not into him.. because she is.. she is just was working through some things.

ever heard that saying "somethings are better left unsaid"??

sometimes you have to pick and choose what you will tell someone, will it affect them/hurt them ,? and did she do anything wrong? NO?? not as i see it.

if she were to continue conversing w/ him and intimate details well then that could be a problem.. but i am friends w/ an ex of mine and he knows me soo well that it is so easy to go to him for advice .. no romantic interest whatsoever he is just a good person who understands me and can give me a good males opinion. is it wrong? no.. he is just a friend..
again it is good to come here and give advice but some people are a bit tooo harsh. nothing wrong w/ giving your opinion but you don't have to be harsh about it either

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Fri, 11-11-2005 - 4:25am

I was thinking more about steph's post to you, because I think she had lots of really good points that made sense.

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-14-2005
Fri, 11-11-2005 - 4:45am
Please define "harsh". As I say what I post in my head, it is said matter-of-factly and just an opinion. There is no emotion behind what I post at all. Putting tone to it is up to the reader. I'm just curious is all. I don't care whatsoever whether she tells him or not. I truly don't. As I said way back when, I haven't walked a mile in either of their shoes so I don't what I'd do. Is being curious being harsh?