Interesting way to reply...
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| Sat, 03-26-2005 - 9:46am |
I received an email from a guy from match stating "you look and sound great, I'd love to know more". So, even though he was older than my criteria (by 15 yrs!) I responded. "Thank you for the compliment, your profile is nice, are your originally from ******, enjoy your day."
So I get an email back like this:
U: Thank you for the compliment
A: deserved
U: your profile is nice
A: thank you
U: are you originally from ******
A: yes, grew up in *******
U: enjoy your day
A: u bet, do you want to exchange email addresses?
I'm guessing U means "you" and A means "Answer"!!??? not sure...Anyway, what are your thoughts on that?? I'm basically not interested due to the age difference so I'll probably email him back saying so. But just wanted to share that interesting reply.

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Exactly. If you're online dating and hoping to find someone to have a relationship with, why would you respond to anyone who doesn't fit your criteria? He's hoping you'll bite and ignore his age. You did so now he has an "in".
I don't think anyone was being cruel though. Just kinda stating the facts and trying to understand. If a guy doesn't fit into my criteria and emails me, I never feel the need to write him back. That's the difference. You don't have to write everyone back who writes ya. I know it's hard - kinda like ya can't take every abandoned animal home either. Well, that might be too different of an analogy but you get my drift.
Happy Easter, Donna!
KitB
I guess I was thinking of all those posts that read, "why did he waste my time emailing me if he wasn't really interested?" This seems to happen a lot in OLD and it's very frustrating when it happens to you.
I just offered up another person's perspective towards your actions.
In your first post, you said his age was a dealbreaker. If that's the case, then there was no point in responding and getting his hopes up. If I were on the receiving end of an email that said basically, "your age is a dealbreaker", I'd be like, "then why the hell did you write to me in the first place, you big jerk???? My age is in my profile, it's not like you didn't know it before you wrote!"
Later in this thread you said that his age wasn't a total dealbreaker...but that's contrary to what you said in your first post, and that's the one I responded to.
What I would do if I were intrigued by someone but there was a potential dealbreaker in his profile is say something like, "thanks for your email. Normally I don't respond to men who are out of my age range, but your profile intrigued me enough that I'd like to know more". That way, he at least knows he doesn't have a very good chance with you.
Sheri
"What I would do if I were intrigued by someone but there was a potential dealbreaker in his profile is say something like, "thanks for your email. Normally I don't respond to men who are out of my age range, but your profile intrigued me enough that I'd like to know more". That way, he at least knows he doesn't have a very good chance with you."
If someone were intrigued by my profile and wanted to know more, I most certainly would think that I had a chance with them.
KitB
Donna, sometimes when scanning through Online Dating sites I might read something in a profile that sparked my interest. I don't mean romantically-speaking; I mean as in Wow That's Interesting And I'd Like To Know More. So I would write them an innocent email and inquire. In EVERY case, the response back was written with a 'I am' or an 'I am not' interested-in-you tone (even though that was not my intent).
What it boils down to is (it appears) no one on a OLD site is interested in platonic chat. And any inquiry (regardless of intent) is viewed as romantic interest.
If a gal were to write me with "Normally I don't respond to men who are out of my age range, but your profile intrigued me enough that I'd like to know more" I would read that as: "WOW, I'm gonna toss aside a MAJOR DEALBREAKER of mine because you are SO HOT."
LOL.
I know you were mostly joking in your inimitable JAHD fashion ;-), but you and Lisa have a point. The reply should probably say something more like, "Although I'm not sure we're a match due to our age difference, there was enough of interest in your profile that I'm interested in learning more".
Sheri
Pianoguy agrees with Sherri's response.
Sheri, 'Inimitable' has more than trwee syllables, so I don't know what that means. I'll guess it means sexy. But if my guessing is like my Lottery luck, I'll leave well enough alone.
: D.
Back on point, for Donna specifically and you Ladies in general... unless there is a REAL interest on OLD for a guy... you do not write unless you WANT a RETURN response.
All kidding aside, I would take Donna's return inquiry as a bonafide interest, not as a shot in hell (for me). It would not clue me in to be cautiously 'optimistic'.
Yeah...sexy...sure, that's what it means ;-)!!!
We're back to where we started...I agree, as I indicated in my first post in this thread: sending a response without any sort of qualification (which is what she did) indicates interest...and it's not nice to do that, IMO, unless you ARE interested.
Sheri
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