Is it possible

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2006
Is it possible
5
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 1:24pm
Hey, I am new here and this is my first post, but I have a question. Is it possible to fall in love with someone that you have never physically met? A few months ago I began talking with a guy that lives in CA, and I live in PA. We have a lot in common as far as beliefs and all that other stuff, and we talk all the time. We only chatted twice online before we started with the phone. Ever since then we have talked every day for at least two hours, and usually much more than that. We also text each other through out the day and say things like "hi" or "i'm thinkin about you." We both have discussed how we feel about each other and we both decided to remove our profiles. We are not going to be able to meet until June due to money and work obligations. I feel really strongly about this guy, and I know he feels the same way. So is it possible that I have fallen in love or is it just infatuation. Any advice would be greatly appreciated:). Thanks
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-01-2005
In reply to: kellee9
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 4:11pm

I think most of us will say that you can't know for sure until you share physical space with the man.

In my opinion, people connect the best when they have physical chemistry as well as the emotional connection. And physical chemistry can't be judged over the phone. Also, I think being in the same place at the same time helps you get a better feel for what a person is really like. The phone and e-mail limit how well you can know someone.

It sounds like you do have a connection with this guy, but I'd look at it more as a possibility of something more rather than love at this point. You just don't want to get your hopes up too high and then have them dashed when you finally meet him face to face.

AJ, enjoying life with C.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2006
In reply to: kellee9
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 4:31pm
Thank you so much for the advice. I definetely know that he and I have a connection, and I know that we have feelings for each other, but just not sure what. I think it will be easier to tell when we are actually physically together. Thanks again!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
In reply to: kellee9
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 4:45pm

Try to keep a rein on your emotions and feelings until you meet. As tallgirl said, it really isn't possible to fall in love with a PERSON you've never met. It is possible to fall in love with the "idea" of that person or rather the persona that they have displayed to you online and on the phone. Until you spend time together, that's all you know. Hopefully this could work out but a LOT of online "connections" don't amount to relationships. You don't want to be disappointed so keep your expectations realistic.

Also, you'll need to think about your distance issue - but I wouln't worry about that until after you meet in person. Good luck and hopefully you'll meet someone great!

131.gif image by y_baros th5K.gif image by jade_simo

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-22-2006
In reply to: kellee9
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 7:07pm
I would just like to say to you i have the same situtation as you do, from ca, and I am suppose to go and meet in june he was comming here to texas this weekend but new job stopped that, we have been talking for months on line and with phone, I never had a profile up, I met him in a game we play called Ashron's Call and we both read Robert jordan's wheel of time, I am scared, I have never had anything to do with on line relationships until him, he talks sweet and loveing and never talks any hard sex on line or on the phone, just throws in a joke every now and then, we have photos up in MSN. and have we guess talked about everything,but still like you not sure at all
Avatar for phoenixmama
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
In reply to: kellee9
Wed, 02-22-2006 - 10:35pm

Funny, one of my best gf's is in a LDR & she met the guy thru an RP/creative writing board based on Wheel of Time. She is here in US and he is in London, they've been "together" for over a year and each spent a little over a week visiting each other. I think it's a little nutso but hey, it's forced her to finally learn communication & patience :) and he actually does seem like a good match for her.

That is how the first online matches happened anyway, people randomly meeting through a common interest. It is possible but rare, you really don't know until you spend time together in person. It's more likely to have an "online relationship" that may never turn into anything "offline".